Wednesday, 22 April 2015

being a little braver on my blog

Your worth is not measured in likes, comments, notes or followers; but in your ability to love, keep comments to yourself, take note and lead.

Several weeks ago I wrote about turning off the comments on my blog. I did this because I am still so new to the whole blogging process and I felt my self worth was being tied up with whether I received a comment or not and whether I should gear my posts to encourage comments. I also read a post about trolls and mean comments and that really freaked me out. Since then I've had a bit of time to think and learn and hear other's viewpoints and maybe it's time for me to be a bit braver.


I am a tad OCD and also a tad "delicate in my sensibilities" in that I place way too much value on what people think and say. I want to write stuff that resonates with others, but I don't want that to be my driving force. My prime motive for writing this blog was to wrap my head around all the changes and thought processes I'm undergoing at this midlife stage I've entered. I'm sure some of what I think has been thought a million times before and some is completely random but I needed to get myself in a place where I knew what I wanted to write and how I wanted to write it.

The funny thing is that I never expected anyone to read anything I wrote - I didn't realize that there were wonderful communities of like-minded women who were writing blogs too. I didn't know about link ups and blog building facebook posts or any of that stuff. I have already "met" so many lovely ladies and I'm noticing that I am commenting on their blogs and they've noticed they can't comment on mine.

So, with great trepidation and a firm grip on my wavering self-esteem, I'm going to undo my comment blocking and open myself up to more conversations and feedback and camaraderie and just go with the flow of being part of a big wide blogging world that I was completely unaware of less than six months ago! So......it's a big HI!! from me and I'd love you to leave a "howdy" back to me in my newly established comments section and thanks so much for reading this and being one of those lovely people who I have had the pleasure of encountering online.


10 comments:

  1. Way to go Leanne! I was in fact frustrated that I couldn't leave you nice comments here and had to go to the Google+ section to do it:) I'm happy you've braved up, and trust me, I know exactly the anxiety about nasty comments. But then again, I'm thinking if we write on the Internet for everybody to see, then we're already exposed enough and there's no turning back. I mean you can't write for yourself and publish it on the Internet. They say that to write a blog, one has to have very thick skin, in case we encounter nasty people. Let's develop this thick skin and continue writing anyways. Plus, I don't know if you saw it, but you can choose the option for comment moderation, where you choose which comment eventually gets published. happy to see you opening up to all this possibilities:)
    Abby

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    1. Thanks Abby! I thought I'd just put myself out there and let it flow - I was more worried about basing my blogging on how others saw me.....but you know what? I'm loving meeting people like you so I guess there are a lot of positives along with letting my skin thicken a little xx

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  2. I agree with Abby I have wanted to comment before to and hated having to do it on Google this feels so much more personal to me. I have been blogging for a year and a half and I have never had a troll or nasty comment. What I do is set up my moderation so that a commenter's very first comment is moderated and then after that they are automatically published but like I said I have never had that problem before. I have found so many lovely, supportive people and like you I was completely dumbfounded by it. I didn't even have a Facebook page before I started my blog! Now it is such a huge part of my life. My challenge to you as you are making these kinds of changes in your life, is to decide what you are passionate about. With me of course it is being an Alzheimer's Caregiver but that is only one part of my life in a whole big, gooey pie that's why I added "the diary" part because I don't want to be limited to just one subject. I just love to write...anything and everything! I'm going to really enjoy getting to know you better!

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  3. Thanks for that Rena - it is tricky trying to find what really engages me - I'm not big on the term "passion" - in fact my next post is a bit anti-passion - because it's now used so liberally. I love that you are so committed to your mum and to your journey caring for her - that genuinely comes under the heading of a real "passion" not all the fluff and bubble stuff. I'm hoping I'll find my balance as time goes on between stuff that excites me and stuff that is just random and fun. Thanks for the encouragement & blog-friending x

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  4. Welcome to the world of blogging. (I'm 3 years in.) I'm trying to be zen about blogging so that it doesn't become a source of anxiety for me. All my best to you. I hope that you enjoy the writing process and that you connect with like minded readers. Cyber hugs!

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    1. Wow Karen - that sums things up perfectly! Zen will be my new middle name :) thanks so much for taking the time to send me a cyber hug & here's one back to you!

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  5. Having enjoyed everything I have read of yours, I cannot imagine that you will be the topic of too many topics! I like comments because I feel a lot more connected to my readers - and to the bloggers to whom I comment :) Looking forward to some conversations!

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    1. Thanks Susan - I feel like it's time to be more open and not make it hard for people to connect just because I'm a bit of a scaredy cat! Looking forward to chatting too! x

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  6. I'm so glad you turned your commenting back on! I've really enjoyed reading your blog and getting to know you better. I'm just like you - trying to find my way in this midlife and blogging has been such a wonderful journey. In my year of blogging I've only had a few "rude" comments and I just deleted them - ha!

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    1. Thanks Lana - I love that deleting is an option (hopefully I won't need it!) And its lovely to be connected back in & sharing the midlife journey :-)

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