Wednesday, 23 November 2016

Wind-Back Wednesday ~ Don't Be A Light Sucker

Don't suck the light and joy out of other people - choose to shine!

DARK SUCKING

A few years ago I heard about the Dark Sucker Theory where, in a nutshell, the idea is that electric light bulbs don't give off light, rather, they suck in the dark. This is of course a load of bollocks, but the idea that something can suck in the dark and leave light in it's place is an interesting concept.

I was thinking that the reverse would also be true, that a Light Sucker would suck in light and leave darkness behind. I took it a step further and thought about how this applies to certain people I've come across in life. They are the people who never have any joy in their life - they just lurch from one miserable day to the next and delight in sharing their doldrums with everyone they come in contact with.


MISERY GUTS-ERS

These people just seem to drag you down, they are always moaning about their latest illness, the latest insult from someone, the latest unfair thing that happened to them, their miserable childhood, the fact they have no friends (surprise surprise), their unappreciative children, etc, etc. You start a conversation with them feeling quite bright and chirpy and by the end of it you are dragged down into the miasma that is their life. They can't see themselves doing it and genuinely believe they are hard done by and need to tell you their grievances - these people are Light Suckers.

POOR ME

I do my best to avoid Light Suckers because I don't want to be drawn into their pity party or "poor me" view of life. it is easy to go down that path and if you get mired too deeply in the darkness this creates, then you start sucking out other people's light too because they get drawn into the misery with you.

The older we get, the easier it is to fall into the trap of moaning about life's injustices and misadventures and how we're being left out or left behind. The whole empty nest thing is a classic example - "poor me, my children have left home and made lives for themselves and don't call me every day" or "poor me, I don't know what to do with all the time I have on my hands now I don't have a family to take care of." 


make the effort to shine light  rather than sucking it out of everyone.


SHINE - DON'T SUCK

Sometimes it takes a bit of effort to look at the brighter side of things and find joy in mid-life with all its little aches and pains and ups and downs. Getting older brings a natural decline in some areas, and the "joys" of menopause, weight gain, poor sleep, slower metabolisms etc. We can dwell on these or choose to look past them and see there is still a lot of light and life left to give out and share with others.

As for me, I'm making a conscious effort to not slide into Light Sucker-dom and instead, I'm choosing to shine light out to others wherever possible. Rather than sucking light off people and leaving a grayness behind, I want to leave people feeling happier for having spent time with me. Sometimes it's hard to avoid the trap of being a Light Sucker, but if we keep working on it then maybe we can become the sort of people that others look forward to having a conversation with. Let's make it our goal in life to Shine!
Don't suck the light and joy out of other people - choose to shine!


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Windback Wednesday ~ www.crestingthehill.com.au

32 comments:

  1. I don't get affected by people like that, usually. But I have done some good culling of late.

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    1. My culling is getting to stratosphere levels Carol - and I don't regret any of it - it is bringing me a lot of joy!

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  2. It's taken me a long time to not let people affect me in this way. Thanks for sharing!

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    1. Me too Naina - but it's very freeing once you figure out who is worth spending time with and who to let go.

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  3. It's working because I like to spend time with you! :)

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    1. Oh Diane - that is the loveliest compliment :) Right back at you x

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  4. This is an important reminder..thanks for writing :)

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    1. I need the reminder Aditi and I hope it helps others too x

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  5. Replies
    1. I'm so glad you liked it - letting these people ease out of our lives, and not becoming like them is worth the effort involved isn't it?

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    1. Thanks Bonnie - and I hope you shine your light too x

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  7. I like the visual of drawing in the light from darkness. It's also nice to think that perhaps some of my light will illuminate the darkness in someone'a life.

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    1. The thought of bringing light to others, rather than sucking it out of them is something we should all be working on isn't it Helene - the world would be a much nicer (and brighter) place!

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  8. Excellent advice, which reminds me of the chorus from my Favorite Song, John Lennon's Instant Karma. :)

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    1. It really is Karma at work when you look at it like that isn't it Roz - giving and getting light.

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  9. Good points! I try to remember every day not to be a light sucker; some days are easier than others... :-) That's why reminders like this post are helpful!

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    1. I'm getting better at it every day Andrea - it beats becoming a grumpy old woman who people avoid!

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  10. You are a shining light Leanne no doubt about that!

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    1. What a lovely compliment Sue - from one light to another :) x

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  11. You're shining bright!!! Sadly, my own mother was a light sucker ... she had a personality disorder. It wasn't an easy upbringing, that's for sure!

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    1. Narcissists and people with personality disorders are so hard to cope with - especially as a child. I think you've done wonderfully to rise above your childhood Janet x

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  12. Awesome post Leanne - I so agree with you. Life is what you make it. It's also totally up to you to go out and make an effort, make friends or achieve something, nobody else will do it for you. Keep shining bright! #TeamLovinLife

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    1. Thanks so much Lyndall - it really is about sharing the love and spreading the light isn't it? So many people benefit and you get the blessing too.

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  13. I think you take the prize for new words, well done and we all know what you are saying :) A lovely post and may we all learn to shine. Thanks for radiating light.
    Kathleen
    Bloggers Pit Stop

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    1. thanks Kathleen - my husband thinks I'm a creative word user too - especially after a week in the steamy tropics - I had a LOT of words to describe how hot it was!

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  14. But I take such joy in being a fun sucker. Wear those bike helmets! Get those shots! No junk food! Fun sucking is what I do best.
    Thanks for writing - i am always inspired by your posts.
    Kathleen Lovlie
    @DrLovlie

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    1. Fun sucking - I love it Kathleen! I think all Mum's have to be the fun suckers - but after that "responsible" phase you can go out and ride a bike without a helmet when nobody is looking :)

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  15. Shine, don't suck. Love it.
    There are definitely a lot of energy thieves in our world. Shine, don't suck would make the best t-shirt slogan.
    #TeamLovinLife

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    1. I might even get that T-shirt Leanne - I could set up my own etsy store and sell them to Midlifers :)

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  16. Couldnt agree more. Nothing worse than hsving the happiness sucked out of you! #Lovinlifelinky

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  17. Congratulation this post made the most clicked list. Be looking for a feature on Friday.
    Kathleen
    Bloggers Pit Stop

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