HOW FULL IS MY GLASS?

Midlife Musings - a question I ask myself is How Full Is My Glass?

HOW FULL IS MY GLASS

One of the questions I've been asking myself lately is to do with the old 'glass half full' concept. It seems we always focus on the glass being half full or half empty, but what if we thought about how full our individual glass actually was?

MY NEW ROLE MODEL

My sister-in-law has had her work hours reduced by half and has been told that her job will be finished at the end of the year. She isn't ranting and raging over this, or bad mouthing her boss, or crying into her cup of tea. No, she is busy networking and looking around for the next opportunity - and with her personality and skills I'm sure she'll find something before too long. 

It was what she said to me when we were discussing her job loss that really stuck in my head. She said "I'm a glass ¾ full type person, so stuff like this doesn't really get me down." And she is! She is upbeat, always has something going on in her life, and will have a go at anything, and do it with all her heart. What a woman! The other day she was in a mud run - no big deal to her, but we all had a smile when the photos popped up on her Facebook page - typical Janine we all thought! What a great role model for Midlife women.
Janine in the middle of the Mud Run
Janine in the middle at her Mud Run day

THE OPPOSITE GLASS

On the other side of the glass spectrum are those whose glass isn't half full or half empty - theirs is completely empty (and full of cracks - where the happiness has leaked out over time). They seem to be incapable of filling their own glass because they have no outside interests, no deep friendships, no investment in anything that motivates them, and a persistent view of life being unfair and sad.

Their only solution is to try to fill their glass by sipping from the glasses of other people. Their need to be affirmed and to be helped siphons the people around them and, while it might fill their glass a little, it drains from the glass of the person they are with. The problem also remains that their glass is full of cracks, so any happiness they manage to top their glass up with just drips away and they're back to empty again. A really sad cycle to live with every day. But ultimately the only way to fix it is to fill the cracks and start looking for ways to pour into the glass themself, rather than depending on others.

Happiness comes from within - you'll never get it from chasing things

WHAT DOES MY GLASS LOOK LIKE?

This is the question I've been asking myself since Janine first mentioned her ¾ capacity. I'd like to think I was as filled up with happiness and positivity as she is, but I know that's not really the case. I'm probably at the halfway mark and fluctuating, sometimes I surge up a little and sometimes I dip down - and it's because I'm letting myself be influenced by other people and life's circumstances.

The secret is to remind myself that happiness is a self-fulfilling event - it's an inside job - it doesn't originate from, or depend on others. I'd like to have more than half a glass and I've seen it in Janine and in other naturally upbeat people - it's not the elusive dream, it's attainable if I remember to look at life with positivity and optimism.

How's your glass? Is it half full, is it overflowing, or is it just barely holding some dregs?

Midlife Musings - a question I ask myself is How Full Is My Glass?

This post was shared at some of these great link parties
To keep up to date with my posts, feel free to add your email into the spot especially for it on my sidebar and I'd love you to follow me on Facebook

38 comments

  1. I always say that my glass isn't half full or half empty - but that I've enjoyed the half I did drink & now have space for a refill! Jo.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like that theory - if our glass is half full because we're busy enjoying it then that makes all the difference in the world - especially if we know how to keep re-filling it.

      Delete
  2. You can always refill the cup. I read something like this in a quote Leanne and that's how I've looked at life since then. I agree sometimes the level fluctuates from overflowing to empty but that's life isn't it - a roller coaster sometimes x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I agree Sue - but it's up to us to re-fill it isn't it? Miserable people look to others to top them up and that's when they keep running dry.

      Delete
  3. I know I am a glass half empty person; yet, when times are shit, I will wallow a bit but get back up on the horse again. Shit needs to get done I suppose! :P

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Life is too short to live half empty Sanch - it's really tough to turn it around, but also really sad to think that we can lose years (decades) of our life just getting by - and that would be such a waste.

      Delete
  4. A great post Leanne to remind us of what we have and how we look at things. I admire your sister in laws tenacity in her situation and wish her well. I'm getting better at these sorts of things as I get older and more relaxed in my new retired role.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She is a permanent ray of sunshine Deb - and I admire her for it too. I'm getting better at taking responsibility for filling my glass and not letting others drain it - we need to step up and enjoy what life gives us every day.

      Delete
  5. I loved this added dimension to the half-full concept. It's so true - the more we're busy filling our glass, the less likely we'll be to need to take from others' glasses. What a great thing for me to read this morning as I start my week. Thank you for sharing this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Melody - I'm glad you enjoyed it. It's something that I've been thinking about a lot over the last few years - it's so easy to let other people suck you dry and leave you with an empty glass - I'm getting better at protecting myself from that and taking responsibility for how I react to life.

      Delete
  6. I'm a very optimistic person so my glass will always be at least 3/4 full, just like your sister in law. I believe in making the best of each situation and doing my best to find the positives - because there are positives there to find, if you make the effort to look for them x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kirsty, it's people like you and Janine that make great examples to the rest of us. I know positivity is easier for some people, but we're all capable of it if we try and seeing other people model it is really important - keep shining!

      Delete
  7. I like this post a lot. I have tended to be more of the glass empty person but luckily I am married to a glass full man so he lifts me up when I need it. Did you know our brains are automatically in default to the negative as it as survival tool for us. Many people advise that looking for the good helps change our brain neuroplasticity. I know that following my cancer surgery I have been able to see much more of the good than I might have before this. Interesting isn't it about minds and mindset.
    Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek 34/52. Next Week's prompt: LTW is ONE!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think you've made huge inroads into changing the way you look at life lately Denyse - your positive approach to your cancer battle and the encouragement you give to other bloggers just shines through - your mindset is definitely on the up and up :)

      Delete
  8. What a great post! I try to stay away from the suck the life out of you people as much as possible. I am a full glass kind of woman.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like full glass-ers Haralee. They're much more fun to be around and make life easier for everyone.

      Delete
  9. Leanne, I love your posts so. You always leave me thinking about things from a new perspective. Thank you for this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What a lovely thing to say Andrea - you just topped up my glass a little more :)

      Delete
  10. Great thoughts and I love your sister-in-laws attitude. I just posted the following comment on a Facebook page I help administer along with the verse Deuteronomy 31:8 ---Just this week on my prayer list I have a 4 year old little girl who has complications from open heart surgery, a friend in his 40's who just suffered a major stroke, a grandmother whose grandson died in prison of an overdose, a grandmother raising her grandchild who is struggling physically and mentally with weariness. Yet, we are told not to fear and not to feel discouraged. How can we help it? By trusting God's will. By getting down on our knees in prayer. By reading and believing that Heaven is there for those who seek and do His will and it is so much better than this life! Friends we have to do better at encouraging one another. You never know what someone else is going through. You are needed by so many lost and discouraged souls! You are important because of the message of hope you carry! Share it with someone today!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is beautiful Teresa and so true - we need to be lights for others don't we? I just love being around positive people because bad stuff happens to us all, but it's how we view it and how we choose to respond that really makes all the difference. Remembering God's on our side really helps too.

      Delete
  11. Such an upbeat post, Leanne, and a reminder of how people will pull from our energy when they can't generate their own.

    I used to tolerate that, and I'm sure it was during the years when it seemed all I did was give of myself to everyone but myself. Not anymore. I'm near negative, I scoot.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm the same Susan - I don't mind being a bit of a cheer squad occasionally, but doing it over and over gets so tiring and it's not our job in life to prop everyone up - we all need to take responsibility for ourselves and our attitude don't we?

      Delete
  12. My glass is full. Always.
    That is all! ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can tell Diane - and I love that about you- you always make me smile :)

      Delete
  13. Great post, life is too short to allow anyone to lessen the amount in your glass - always full!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Antionette - I love that you're a full glass person too - the world needs as many positive people as it can get!

      Delete
  14. I think my glass is full--I think that more and more as I age and see others struggle. Yes, it comes from within, but some folks can't seem to get a start. My husband works 3 days a week with homeless people, folks who lost jobs and then lost hope. It does happen. I pray I can keep my glass full so that I can tip it over now and again and contribute to someone's empty glass. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's the secret isn't it Beth - being so full that there is an overflow to help others. It would be truly awful to have an empty glass and no idea how to fill it up - living with that despair would be miserable.

      Delete
  15. "Happiness is an inside job"............I love this! I always feel best when I am helping others. This is what fills me up!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think that's why things like volunteering are so uplifting Ellen - you get a good feeling because you're helping someone else and it's good to give out as well as taking in.

      Delete
  16. Thanks for this post Leanne. It helps me to remember that we all want to be happy, and we all find it elusive at times. It makes me more compassionate. When I'm sitting at a traffic light, I look at the cars around me and say (aloud if I'm alone), "May you know happiness. May you be safe."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What a lovely thing to do Christie - I think I need to do that more - it might reduce my annoyance at the idiots I come across on the road (and elsewhere!) Maybe if we wished others well more often it would change how we see each other.

      Delete
  17. Great post and a good reminder to think about what we have and enjoy life. Thanks for sharing your wonderful posts at Over The Moon Party.
    See you next week.
    Hugs,
    Bev

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Bev - I love the OTM link up and it's nice to know you stopped by.

      Delete
  18. Wow, this is such a great question. I absolutely love Janine's '3/4 full' philosophy.
    I once heard someone say that 'when your glass isn't at least half full, it's time to get a new glass". This quote has always stuck with me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I always wonder about replacing the glass Donna - I think it's about appreciating the glass you have and looking at ways to fill it back up again (kind of like being married - don't toss out the "glass" just keep re-filling it so it doesn't run dry)

      Delete
  19. Love the quote - "Happiness is an inside job"! How true! Thanks for sharing at The Bloggers Pit Stop! Roseann from wwww.thisautoimmunelife.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's something I've really taken on board in the last few years Roseann - you just can't rely on others to keep you happy or you're destined to a very unsettled life!

      Delete