Monday, 20 April 2015

regrets I've had a few.....

Ecclesiastes 3:12 I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live

I've been thinking about making some changes in my life lately and one of the biggest motivators is that I need to live my life now and be happy now and not look back and regret all the time I wasted trudging through life waiting for the rainy day I was always planning for.

While I've been mulling things over I came across the top five regrets of the dying and thought to myself that if I don't move my tushie (is that how you spell it??) and do something with my life I'm at risk of all five. I started to think of them all individually from where I am at this moment and things could do with a great deal of improvement!


the top five regrets of the dying

#1  I spend way too much of my time doing what other people expect me to do - not because I am forced to, but because it is what I think I should be doing. I work because "someone has to" - well maybe that someone is not going to be me for a while. Maybe I'll kick back and be a lady of leisure for a time and see what life brings along.

#2  I wish I hadn't worked so hard - 33 years of working (except for a short time off with each of my children - going back before I was ready because we had bills to pay) and I think I am at a place in life where I can work a little less - or maybe not at all. Maybe my good husband can be the sole provider for a while until I find where I'm supposed to be. We aren't big spenders and the wolf isn't anywhere near the door, so now is as good a time as any to take the leap.

#3  Expressing my true feelings is always tricky - I'm constantly doing my best to put a good face on things and soldier on, I tell myself and everyone else that it's all fine, but you know what? It's not. I was secretary for our church for the last six years (and for another church for six years before that - all in a voluntary capacity), then I realized that I was just doing stuff because "someone had to do it" and I resigned at the beginning of the year - no more putting on a pleasant smile and sucking it up - I might do it again in the future, but at present I need to not do something I am unhappy doing - especially in a church environment. I also don't want to pretend anymore that I love working at the same job day in and day out - I want to admit I'm tired of it and have a break.

#4  I want to invest more in friendships - have more time to sit and chat and drink coffee (I'm not a wine drinker - unfortunately - I've been told it would make my life a lot more bearable - but it tastes like vinegar to me.....) Anyway, I don't want to squeeze catch-ups into my lunch break or try to co-ordinate a weekend when we're all free, I plan on "getting my girl on" and being more involved in my female friends' lives and find more time for deepening those long term friendships - and maybe making a few new ones along the way.

#5  Most importantly of all - I want to be happier! Not just a bit happy here and there, or surprised when I'm happy, but to have a spirit of joy again......it got lost somewhere along the way and I am ready to claim it back. I'm going to find my Mojo again and hopefully a new direction in life.

Change is scary for a person like me - I always pick the safe choices, but I don't want to die with those five regrets (or live with any of them now). I want to live happy and then die happy - knowing that I made other people happy too and that I left this world having lived a worthwhile life of joy and doing good..........not just getting through the daily grind until retirement.


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