Next letter up for the A-Z challenge of Positive Personality Traits is O - and O is for Ownership. This was actually a bit of a tricky letter to choose a personality trait for. I was tossing up over 'out-going' or 'open' but settled on the trait of taking ownership - in the area of your decisions and your actions. Not fobbing responsibility off onto others.
I wrote a post a couple of weeks ago titled "Damn You Steve" which was about playing the blame game. I know it's something I can be guilty of at times because if there is someone to blame then you can throw your hands up in the air and shrug off any ownership of a problem or a consequence.
Life isn't a free ride, there are always decisions to be made or actions you need to take that will not necessarily result in a happy conclusion. Part of being a responsible adult is taking ownership of these and stepping up when you know that the going might be a bit bumpy in the process.
Taking ownership of a less than fantastic outcome is what makes the rubber hit the road. It's called "walking your talk" where I come from - knowing that you will follow through and not just say something and letting other people do all the work (or having them clean up the mess you leave behind in your wake).
Ownership can have positive aspects to it too. When compliments come our way it is time to accept them graciously and own the moment. It might be about something you're wearing, or something you've produced, or something you've thought of, but when it strikes a chord with someone else and they tell you, take it on and be grateful for the positive energy being sent your way. Too often we shrug off our hard work as "nothing" when that's not the case at all. If you've put in the hard yards then you deserve to own the praise that comes your way.
Ownership is another grown-up trait. It doesn't mean being big headed about our successes or (in contrast) petty enough to blame others for our less fabulous moments. It is taking responsibility for our actions and for ourselves and the consequences that arise.
See you next time for the continuation of Positive Personality Traits - P is for Patient.
I like this trait. And like you mentioned, its not an easy one. Its so easy to pass on the blame to something or someone.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Seena
#AtoZChallenge - O is for Onesie
I think we all play the blame game too often Seena and taking ownership is tough at times.
DeleteLoved this trait .. as it do comes with so much responsibility and maturity..
ReplyDeletehttp://serendipityofdreams.blogspot.in/2016/04/krishn-buddh-shiv.html
thanks Deepti - and you are completely correct in the correlation between ownership, responsibility and maturity.
DeleteWhat a great idea for a post series, and the photos you've used are so pretty and striking!
ReplyDelete--G
http://gingerwroot.com
thanks so much Ginger - I had a lot of fun picking the background images to fit in with a theme.
DeleteSpot on Leanne - Ownership to me is empowering. Once you take ownership or responsiblity you are empowered to achieve. I like the part of taking ownership of a compliment. So many of us just don't know how to accept a compliment graciously. xxSue @Sizzling60 from
ReplyDeleteSizzling Towards Sixty
That's so true Sue, I know I find accepting compliments difficult - I'm learning to say thank you now because it's a lovely feeling when someone takes the time to say something nice to you or about you.
DeleteThis is what I call a really mature trait, again a rare one! I really admire who take ownership for their deeds...both the good and the bad! Also liked what you said about embracing and taking credit for something you've taken a lot of effort with, instead of shrugging it off! Another great post Leanne :)
ReplyDelete@KalaRavi16 from
Relax-N-Rave
thanks Kala - I think we often want everything to revolve around us but don't always want the consequences that come with that. Being adult enough to step up is a real sign of maturity.
DeleteI enjoyed reading everyone's comments on this topic. I agree, taking ownership of our actions and thoughts is empowering and mature. It's so much easier to blame our parents, blame society, blame anyone. Unless you like playing the victim, you must take ownership.
ReplyDeleteRepaying the visit from AtoZ
Wendy
Jollett Etc.
thanks Wendy - I completely agree that it seems to that there's always someone or something to blame if we look hard enough - it's being a grown-up and owning it that is the tricky part. Thanks for the visit :)
DeleteThis is really a toughie. I love blaming others for things that go wrong and gladly take credit for things that go right. Thanks for pointing out the need to be responsible for our own actions
ReplyDeleteI think it's a failing we all have - and we probably all need to work on a bit in our lives.
DeleteSo glad I followed along on these posts, Leanne! Another wonderful trait that children could learn early on. It would make them think twice about impulsive behavior and save a lot of misery. Ownership means following through even when difficult. And yes, owning compliments that come your way. Good job!
ReplyDeletehttps://meinthemiddlewrites.com/2016/04/18/me-in-the-middle-of-atozchallenge-letter-o/
thanks so much Mary Lou - I'm enjoying meeting you and some of the other #atoz bloggers too - it's been a really interesting time reading so many versions of each letter.
DeleteOwnership is so important. I'm not sure that it's something kids can learn easily. As really owning our attributes and challenges take a perspective adulthood brings--or so I think!
ReplyDelete~pia
http://courtingdestiny.com
I agree Pia - adulthood brings a better understanding - unfortunately not all adults put it into practice!
DeleteSo nice of you to share this. There are fellows who belive in accusing others for their failure. Thanks for sharing it.
ReplyDelete@authorparomita for
https://rollingstonepictureproduction.wordpress.com/2016/04/18/oogly-boogly-grow-up-messy/
a pleasure Paromita and you're right - there are a lot of people who are happy to play the blame game.
DeleteHere. Today. The O for ownership is taking ownership of my flaws.
ReplyDeleteNever Carla - I think you're perfect - you don't have flaws!
Delete"walking your talk".... I like that.
ReplyDeleteIt's a challenge Colleen but definitely shows you're authentic.
DeleteGreat post! I have a real, (hostile, steam coming out of my nose) issue with people who like to blame and not take OWNERSHIP! You did a great job explaining it so simply but it is truly a foreign concept to the blamers. Steam coming out of my ears now too thinking about this!
ReplyDeleteI agree Haralee - blaming is the easy way out and then you are never responsible for hurting anyone or causing pain. Grown ups don't do that, but there's a lot of people stuck in infancy emotionally!
DeleteOwnership is hard sometimes. Even at my age I find myself wishing I could deny certain things but, of course, ownership is part of growing up.
ReplyDelete@Kathleen01930
Meet My Imaginary Friends
#AtoZchallenge
My point exactly Kathleen - it's a sign of maturity for sure :)
DeleteHi Leanne! Wow! I can't believe you are still doing the challenge! I just spent the extraordinary weekend at BAM '16 in Las Vegas and it seems like I've been gone a while. Sure wish you could have been there too because it would have been great to meet in person. And yes to ownership. I think it is similar to "responsibility" which is one of the letters in "SMART" In order to move forward, learn and grow from anything we need to accept ownership for sure. ~Kathy
ReplyDeleteI wish I could have been at BAM too Kathy - so many bloggers I've gotten to know were there and I was quite jealous! And yes you're right (as always) ownership and responsibility go hand in hand!
DeleteCool challenge! And ownership's a cool challenge all in itself. Thank you.
ReplyDeletethanks Sheila - it's been very full on but I aim to finish it!
DeleteYou have mentioned about a wonderful trait here Leanne. Taking ownership or taking responsibility is something many of us shy away from just to be saved from any problems in the future. And the saddest part is if someone amongst us takes the ownership, instead of supporting the person we start the blame game round if something goes wrong.
ReplyDeleteI really like people who have it in them to take up ownership and be responsible!
Once again a lovely post Leanne :)
Cheers,
Srivi - AtoZChallenge
O for Obsession | Twitter
thanks Srivi and that is so true - if you step up and take blame that isn't yours then you can be reinforcing poor behaviour in others - own what's yours and let the rest go.
Deleteownership IS the grown up trait that sets us apart from children. It's definitely when you learn to walk your talk. I'm trying to instill this in my daughter and hope that as she grows she can grow more comfortably into that.
ReplyDeleteIt is such an important value to instil in our children Rosie - the world teaches them to push responsibility on to others but taking ownership is such a strong sign of maturing well.
DeleteSo true. I feel that so many adults today do not take ownership and do not want to be responsible for their actions. This is a trait that needs to be taught again, a trait that needs to be instilled into people. I love the way you talk about this trait (both the positive and negative side) and I enjoyed your post.
ReplyDeletethanks so much Charlotte - we are so quick to shrug off consequences and compliments - perhaps if we took both on board we would be more rounded people :)
DeleteOwnership is a tough one. I see lots of folks struggle with it. It's often difficult to own up to your end of the blame game. Love this letter! Thanks so much for these thought provoking posts!
ReplyDeletethanks so much - I'm enjoying the challenge of the challenge :) and reading some new blogs (like yours) along the way :)
DeleteA very powerful word Ownership, and a trait when developed in childhood as 'responsibility and attitude' gives a person confidence in making those decisions they should own up to. Well put on the ability to accept and own compliments...as well as being the kind of person who graciously gives those accolades.
ReplyDeleteAgain, thanks for your daily comments on my blog. Your comment today was especially appreciated...mature gals still rock! Thanks.
Sue at CollectInTexas Gal
It's been lovely connecting with you Sue (and seeing all your interesting collections and hobbies!) and yes, we mature girls have still got all that it takes plus a bit more :)
DeleteThis is so important and I think many parents let their children escape ownership. "If you do the crime, you have to do the time." That's the rule in our house.
ReplyDeleteSusan Says
I completely agree Susan - if children don't learn about consequences (and rewards) they never grow past the infant stage emotionally - it's our responsibility as parents to grow our children in all areas.
DeleteI love this, Leanne, both aspects - the positive and the negative. I'm glad you settled on this topic for your "O" post and you did a fabulous job articulating it. Thank you for sharing this -- it is definitely a grown-up personality trait we all need!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Wendy - it was a trait that really spoke to me once I decided on it - I think our world is drifting away from it because by passing the buck we can lose the pain that might be part of sucking it up and owning it!
DeleteLove the saying "walking your talk". I'd say it's also very rare nowadays... I must note that from all people I know only my father is the one who fulfilled every single promise he made and we both (my brother and I) live by the high standards we've learned from him :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful legacy from your father Zeljka - I wish I could say the same about mine!
DeleteLet's be honest: we all play the blame game sometimes(except maybe Buddhist monks) and we all have work to do when it comes to owning our actions. Even those of us who tend to exaggerate our faults still often neglect to acknowledge when our actions are holding us back.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, I really should listen to myself more often.
~Dianna
http://www.thedabbler.ca
I totally agree Dianna and I know I am a work in progress in this area (and in so many of the other areas I'm covering in this series :)
DeleteI do love "ownership" as a trait and have not long completed a mentoring series and this was one of our topics. Thanks you for sharing on #overthemoon
ReplyDeleteI think it's a very undervalued quality Jen and one we all need to focus on more :)
DeleteI love how you played both sides of this: owning our mistakes/failures and accepting compliments and kudos. Lovely post. Thank you for sharing!
ReplyDeletethanks Rica - I think both are important - it brings balance and maturity and grace if you can own both :)
Delete