FINDING SERENITY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD

How moving across the world brought acceptance, peace and serenity into the this woman's second half of life.

INTRO

Today I have the next guest in my MIDLIFE SYMPHONY series where I've asked others to share what they're doing to make the second half of life the best half of life. Cheryl (from Born In A Car) is a fellow West Aussie who now lives on the other side of the world to me. Her life and adventures leave me dumbfounded at times - it takes a lot of courage to pack up and leave everything that's familiar to start a new life in a foreign country.

Today Cheryl's sharing how her move to Moscow was the beginning of a whole new second stage of life, currently more changes are afoot and she's been documenting them on her blog - this is her overview of how her life changed in Eastern Europe.


MY SECOND HALF OF LIFE 

For me, Midlife is one of the most exciting times of my life! And the reason for that is travel. In my early years, I didn’t have the money to travel. Plus, living in Australia meant that most of the world was completely out of reach for a single mother with only a part-time job. It was just too expensive to go anywhere.

Then at the age of 39 I went to live in Moscow, Russia, to teach English.


HOW MOSCOW CHANGED ME

Living in Moscow was an amazing experience, and allowed me to fulfil many dreams – including travelling. I was able to go to Germany for a weekend, or to visit London for a week. It’s not too expensive. You can’t do that from Australia! As an Australian girl, I never dreamed that I would be able to visit so many wonderful places.

Now, at 53, my life is opening up even more! The second half of my life is turning out better than any other period of my life! I have experience, I have courage, I have strength and I have patience. I didn’t have these things when I was younger, and it would have been impossible for me to travel the world before.


Cheryl and her French husband Olivier in Moscow
Cheryl and her French husband Olivier in Moscow
Living in a place where you have to deal with everything in another language, where traditions and customs are different, and where you are mostly unsupported because your ‘support network’ is on the other side of the world, is certainly terrifying at times. And, although a lot of younger people do exactly this, it was simply impossible for me in my younger years.

Age and experience has made me fearless!

MOVING ON FROM MOSCOW

As I write this, my time in Russia has come to an end. We lived here for more than 10 years, and it’s time for a change. We’d decided to just travel for a year or so. Visit our favourite places, and also some new ones. Go to Australia and see our daughter and grandchildren, and other family and friends.

My husband and I had everything planned, including our itinerary for the first few months after leaving Moscow. We’d planned places to visit, bought flights and train tickets, booked hotels. We had an exciting time ahead, simply travelling the world for a while, without a care.

WHEN A PANDEMIC GETS IN THE WAY

And then. Corona virus. Flights cancelled, countries blocked, travel plans gone awry! Yesterday we received our first email advising us that one of our flights has been cancelled. It’s the flight we booked to take us out of Russia and into Belgium.

And then we were ‘forced’ to leave Russia (by my husband’s employer) with only 4 days notice, a month before we were due to leave for our extended world-wide holiday! If this had happened when I was younger, I would have panicked. I would have cried. I would have been devastated. I probably would have had a thousand arguments with my husband. I know what I was like when I was younger.


Cheryl in Bucharest, Romania
Cheryl in Bucharest, Romania

ACCEPTANCE, PEACE, AND SERENITY

But, it seems that Midlife has given me something that I don’t really know how to name. It’s not tolerance, nor patience.

Maybe it’s acceptance. Acceptance that I’m not in control here. Acceptance of a situation I can’t change. Just like in the ‘Serenity Prayer’.


Serenity Prayer - God grant me the serenity  to accept the things  I cannot change;  Courage to change  the things I can;  And wisdom to know  the difference.

And in the second half of my life, I also have this – serenity. And my life truly is serene. I didn’t have this in my younger years. I had anger, blame, and mistrust.

Another quote I love is this one: 


Serenity is not freedom from the storm; but peace amid the storm. #lifequotes

And I do have peace and serenity.

Of course, it would have been better to have found this serenity when I was much younger. But then I wouldn’t be ‘me’, and I wouldn’t have had the same experiences as I’ve had. All past experiences have brought me to this place in my life.

Midlife. With serenity.

And it’s wonderful!

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

I'm assuming you haven't moved across the world to discover yourself and what brings serenity into your life, but have you made any big changes that turned the second half of life into the best half of life for you?

RELATED POSTS



Hi, I’m Cheryl. I’m a 50-something Australian woman, married to a French man (Olivier), currently in Bucharest, Romania. I’m an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher, love taking photos, travelling, and spending time with my husband. I’m a grandmother. My daughter has 2 little boys in Australia, so I haven’t had time to get to know these 2 little men due to living on the other side of the world, but it’s in my plans to do so.

My blog is https://borninacar.com/ – I named it this because I was really born in a car! I’m currently writing about our departure from Russia, where we lived for over 10 years, but I also write about travel, life, nostalgia, and other topics relevant to a mid-life wanderer.


How moving across the world brought acceptance, peace and serenity into the this woman's second half of life.
How moving across the world brought acceptance, peace and serenity into the this woman's second half of life.

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Cresting the Hill - a blog for Midlife (Middle Aged / 50+) women who want to thrive

32 comments

  1. All your past experiences have brought you to this place - so true. Finding serenity in the midst of an upheaval is a difficult one, so here's to plenty of it - serenity, that is. Great post, by the way.

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    1. Hi Jo, yes, it's something I've tried to remember all my life, even in the bad times. Everything we experience is a stepping stone to the next chapter. Thanks for reading and commenting, and I hope that you also have found serenity in your life. :-)

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    2. Hi Jo - Cheryl has an amazing story of embracing all life offers - being able to get through a hugely stressful situation with so much calmness just blows my mind!

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  2. So lovely to meet and see Cheryl. Thanks Leanne! Cheryl has commented on my blog and she'd told me she was from WA and had been living in Russia. Lovely to learn more about her and see her lovely smiling face. I hope her travel plans can get back on track sooner rather than later! x

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    1. Hi Min, thanks for reading and nice that you remember me from your blog. :-) We have some very interesting new travel plans, and life plans, coming up very soon. And I'll be writing about them really soon on Born in a Car so I hope you'll pop over there to take a look! Enjoy the rest of your week! :-)

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    2. Wow that was a teaser and a half Cheryl - you certainly aren't letting the grass grow under your feet! Does that mean our cuppa and chat is still on the cards?

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    3. Leanne, I'm so excited about our next chapter, just waiting on some borders to open up before we can get started! It's going to be difficult, and life changing for both Olivier and I, but we've had plenty of time in the past couple of months to take stock of our life and the world situation, and we think we've found the perfect solution for us. Unfortunately it doesn't involve Australia in the near future, so our cuppa and chat will have to take a raincheck. Of course, we will be in Australia again, just not sure when. :-)

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  3. I am actually a bit sad to say that I haven't made any big changes to my life in recent years.

    With three teens still at home at school and uni I guess I'll have to wait a bit longer before I have the freedom to make the changes I desire.

    Ingrid

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    1. Hi Ingrid, please don't be sad. We all have our lives to live in the way that we've designed them. I used to cry (really) when my daughter was a teenager because I couldn't see that I would ever have my freedom again. But it came eventually, when it was ready, and when I was ready. :-) I had my daughter when I was very young, which meant that my freedom came sooner than it does for others. Hang in there, it will arrive before you know it! Thanks for reading my post. :-)

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    2. I think three teenagers are enough to keep your head spinning for a while - and Cheryl's right in the fact that this stage of life only lasts for a short time and then Midlife opens up with a whole lot of adventures to be had if you're brave enough to jump in - or you can just chill out and enjoy the serenity like those of us who are less courageous!

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  4. Hi, Cheryl - It is a pleasure to meet you here. Yours is a very inspiring story.
    I lived in Beijing, China for fourteen years. I definitely understand 'everything' being different. I love your positive attitude and your candidness. I hope that you are able to reactivate those travel plans soon!

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    1. Hi Donna, ah yes, living in China for 14 years, you're sure to understand how it feels to be different! Such a great experience, isn't it? Thanks for your kind words. About our travel plans, we've decided to put off Asia until another time, because of the uncertainty of travelling there right now. However, we've got some exciting new plans that we hope to get underway really soon! I hope to write about them in Born in a Car really soon! Thanks for reading and commenting! :-)

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    2. Hi Donna - 14 years in China is amazing - isn't it interesting how many different life stories there are in the Midlife blogging world? We all follow our own paths and the end result makes for the diversity that I love in our little community.

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  5. Hi Cheryl, nice to see you here. I have read several of your blog posts in the past. Your Hot Water story was enlightening! Who knew. I hope you will be able to resume your travel plans soon.

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    1. Hi Suzanne, thanks for reading my blog, it gives me a lot of pleasure knowing that there are actual people who enjoy it! :-) Wishing you a great weekend! :-)

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    2. Hi Suzanne - I'm always fascinated when Cheryl writes a new post because her life is so "normal" to her and so completely different to my life. Reading along is like reading a novel!

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  6. Hi Cheryl, I can really relate to where you are in midlife. I agree with you, without our experiences we wouldn't be where we are. I'm glad that you weathered the storm and are stronger for it. Thanks for sharing Cheryl's post Leanne. I know you recognize a great writer who has a lot of important things to say. I'm sharing to fb.

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    1. Hi Christina, yes, I always remind myself that I went through the hard times to get to where I am now. I don't regret any of it, because I like who I am and where I am now. Thanks for your support. :-) xx

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    2. I love how both of you have similar journeys that have ended up in Eastern Europe and with fascinating ongoing stories for us all to follow - life has some interesting twists and turns doesn't it?

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    3. Leanne, I remember when you first told me that Christina was in my part of the world. I'm so glad that I connected with her, we have a lot in common and have become true friends, even though we still haven't met! I'm hoping the real life meeting isn't too far away. Thanks for bringing us together. :-) xx

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  7. Leanne, thank you for introducing us to Cheryl. Peace and serenity do seem to be easier to find after mid-life, don't they? I am missing travel right now too. Hope we both get back on the road soon.

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    1. Hi, thanks for reading my post in Leanne's blog. Yes, it's much easier to find these things now that we're older. I never imagined I would have them at all so it's been a great surprise for me to actually be living this wonderful life that I have. And yes, here's to getting back on the road. All the best to you! :-)

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    2. Hi Laurie - I'm not sure I'd be feeling as peaceful and serene as Cheryl is with all that she's been through over the last couple of months. But I guess the more you put yourself out there, the better you get at handling those curve balls :)

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    3. Leanne, you'd be surprised at what you're capable of when push comes to a shove! xx

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  8. Hi Leanne, Thank you for featuring Cheryl in this interesting and fun Midlife Symphony series.

    Cheryl, I am in awe of your flexibility and courage to move to Russia at 39.

    I love your paragraph when you write about how at 53 “life is opening up even more!” I can see the happiness on your faces in the picture of you and Olivier.

    The “Serenity Prayer” is a great reminder for all of the curveballs in life. And, “Acceptance.”

    I am nodding in agreement with “All past experiences have brought me to this place in my life.”

    A wonderful, inspirational post, Cheryl. Thank you!

    (An aside: I have tried to subscribe to your blog in the past and added my email to your sign up process, yet not received any emails. I subscribed again, and will see whether this works. I often check the #MLSTL posts and I have read your posts through there:)

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    1. Hi Erica - you are such a supporter of all of our midlife blogging community! And yes I'm so in awe of all that Cheryl has done with her life too - especially over the last 10 years or so - what a woman!

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    2. Hi Erika, I'm so glad that you read and appreciated my words in this post. It was a pleasure to write it. I'm just so amazed and happy at how my life is turning out! I'm sure that my family and friends in Australia were also in awe (or something else!) when I told them that I was moving to Russia at 39! It's not something people usually do. :-)

      (If I'm not mistaken, you've managed to subscribe now, right?)

      Leanne, thanks once again for your support and kindness. :-) xx

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  9. Hi Leanne and Cheryl, I have enjoyed following Cheryl's blog and have been in awe of the lifestyle changes and experiences she has shared with us. It's a great midlife story and I'm hoping things can work out for you Chewryl, despite your plans being changed so drastically. Cheryl, I love how you were honest to say you would have cried and had lots of arguments if this had happened in your younger years, it's amazing how we adapt as we grow older and take things in our stride a lot more. Thanks Leanne for sharing Cheryl's story and I have pinned this post for #lifethisweek

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    1. Hi Deb - I wish I could say that I wouldn't have cried or argued if I was in Cheryl's shoes (despite my vast age and wisdom!) I think she just has her sh*** together better than I do - and maybe has a bigger spirit of adventure than I've been gifted with!

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    2. Hi Deb, thanks for following my story. It appears to me that, although we're all on different paths, mid-life is working out to be pretty good for most of us here! Yes, I was really 'unbalanced' when I was younger and I don't feel I achieved very much at all in my early years. 'Adapt' is a great word for what we've had to do to become who we are now. Thanks again, Deb, for supporting my post here on Cresting the Hill.

      Leanne, to be honest, my husband is the stabiliser in our relationship. If I've got my sh** together it's all thanks to him! But the 'spirit of adventure' is 100% me! :-) x

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  10. Thanks so much Cheryl for sharing your update on Leanne's blog. To have plans change with such rapidity thanks to COVID is a huge dose of reality. I am not sure I would have dealt with it well. However, you gotta go with what IS as I know. I do hope you get to see those little men here in Australia soon.

    Thank you for linking up this week. I have changed my blog’s home page; right hand-side, to note the regular bloggers and blog names who link up for Life This Week. I am very grateful that you are one of those. See you next week when the optional prompt is Kindness. Take care, Denyse.

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    1. Hi Denyse, it was a pleasure writing for Leanne. Yes, the drama we've recently gone through was a huge dose of reality, as you said. But I figure it's a good thing, it keeps me grounded! Although you say you wouldn't have dealt with it well, you would have dealt with it your way, and that's fine too! I also hope to get back to Australia for a visit sooner rather than later. Thanks Denyse, for reading and commenting on my post in Cresting the Hill. :-)

      ps. I took a quick look at your new home page and it looks great! I'm going to spend a bit of time over there later today.

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Thanks so much for your comment - it's where the connection begins.