RE-DEFINING "LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE" IN MIDLIFE

Living lightly, Laughing often, Loving always - that's what Midlife has taught me to live each day.

RE-DEFINING "LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE" IN MIDLIFE

Last year was a bit of a tough year for me (you can read about my journey with hip dysplasia HERE if you're visiting). As we get older, physical deterioration is a reality - one we do our best to keep at bay, but it's an inevitable part of the aging process. Pain becomes a reality at times and it's wearying (to say the least), it can so easily distract us from the blessings of Midlife. I truly believe we need to pause now and then and take the time to re-focus and remind ourselves that there's also an incredible amount of joy in this stage of life.

Today I'm choosing to revisit the words I have on my car's rear window - Live, Love, Laugh - and how they play out for me as I head into my 60's......

LIVE LIGHTLY

I shared my Word of the Year last week and it was the impetus for today's post, because I've come to see that you don't have to live life at full blast, or sink into constant negativity - you can choose to live it on your own terms. Some years might be more difficult or more full on than others, and some years need to be taken at a gentler pace. This year ahead for me will be one where I want to gather myself again - to regain my fitness, to improve my sleep, to let go of what's not mine to carry, and to be kinder to myself..... to Live Lightly.

Being kind to myself resonates strongly at the moment. I spent so much of my life trying far too hard to be perfect and feeling like I had to take responsiblity for everything and everyone. My 50's have taught me that I can let a lot of the weight of that go, and not have every single little duck lined up in a row. The lightness that brings is something I'm still coming to terms with - but wow it feels good! I love the quote below - it sums up what living lightly looks like for me.

Something curious happened in her search for happiness.  She realized that so many of the worries she carried around, and most of the stories she had believed about herself, were works of fiction.  She let them go.

LAUGH OFTEN

While I'm quoting others, I saw a Facebook post from Simplify Days that spoke to me about happiness and not having expectations that joy has to come from big events:

Do we overcomplicate happiness?
Do we put too much pressure on big happy moments and not enough reflection on the little ones?
What if we really thought about the tiny moments that put a smile on our faces?
This week let's find those tiny happy things, the things that bring a smile to our faces, even for just a split second.
This week let's be grateful for those small moments because even a small bit of happiness multiple times a day can bring a lot of joy to our lives.

I love simple pleasures, a shared laugh, those little "in jokes" my husband and I share and still laugh over. I don't need to wait for hilarity to arrive before I smile or laugh. I read a "factoid" on the internet that said that babies laugh 300 times a day and adults only laugh 15 -100 times a day. I don't think it's an actual fact, but it did remind me of how little it takes for small children to giggle and laugh and smile, how simple their pleasures are - and to try to recapture some of that in my daily life.....to look for the glimmers of joy, the tiny happy things.

look for the tiny happy things each day

LOVE ALWAYS

This is a huge one for me - loving my husband, loving my family, loving where I live, loving the friends who've been there for decades, loving this stage of life, loving feeling "me" again, loving the blessings that I never take for granted. Life will never be perfect, but when it's full of love, when you see the love and are grateful for it - that's what makes every day a good day.

Love and gratitude go hand in hand, and I never want to become a person who takes love for granted or who fails to appreciate how fortunate I am to have it in my life in abundance. Love is a reciprocation - you give it, you receive it, you share it, you savour it  - and I truly believe that love really does make the world go round. When you reach this second half of life you come to see how blessed you are when you have people in your life who you care for and who care about you - cherish them (and tell them often).

LIVING, LAUGHING AND LOVING IN MIDLIFE

I hope you're living, laughing and loving every day. I hope you find those little moments of happiness that you can catch and hold in a jar to enjoy. I think it's our responsibility to look for them and to recognize how blessed we truly are to be living life so abundantly and well. Are you feeling joy or is life really tough right now? If you're struggling, hold on tight because the sun will definitely break through the clouds and shine again - we just need to give it time and be kind to ourselves while we wait.

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Living lightly, Laughing often, Loving always - that's what Midlife has taught me to live each day.

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Cresting the Hill - a blog for Midlife (Middle Aged / 50+) women who want to thrive
Living lightly, Laughing often, Loving always - that's what Midlife has taught me to live each day.

46 comments

  1. A great post to start 2023 with Leanne. I've just written a post about worry which will be published next week. We waste so much of our time (My WOTY) worrying about things that it robs us of joy. Living well, laughing with joy and loving with passion is certainly the way I want to live my life. x

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    1. Hi Sue - worry has always been a huge issue for me. It's finally becoming less so as I understand more about what drives it in my life. I'm getting better at worrying less about the small stuff, but the bigger issues still set me off. I'm working very hard at letting go and trying not to feel like I need to control everything or have a plan for everything - that definitely helps keep the worry turned down a little. x

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  2. Hi Leanne. I had to start a Pinterest board, just for "happiness", inspired by this post. My husband and I share inside jokes, as well. Usually, we laugh over him teasing me. He imitates the way I talk, and says he finds it cute. It's mostly about the words that I use, since I read a lot. Sharing this post to FB. xxx

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    1. Hi - thank you so much for your lovely comment (and for starting a Pinterest board in my honour - I DO love Pinterest!) I think it's a sign of a long and happy marriage when you have shared humour and "in" jokes that bring back a memory of laughing together over something silly. And thanks again for sharing my post. xx

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  3. You are so wise Leanne. Loved your “tiny happy things” quote, which reminds us to be in the present. I used to be anxious all the time when young and it’s truly a reward of ageing to have lost that. Happy New Year to you and yours, Maria

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    1. Hi Maria - I've definitely found these last 10 years have been a blessing for learning how to let worry have less presence in my life. I was a chronic worrier (still am over the big stuff!) but it has less impact these days and I've finally come to realize that it changes nothing and just causes me a lot of stress and anxiety for no good result.

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  4. Focusing on what's important and enjoying life to the fullest is the way to go and I'm hoping to follow you in this, Leanne.

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    1. Hi Corinne - I think you're already well on the way - and your WOTY will be a great guide for you as you focus on what really matters this year.

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  5. Leanne, it really is that simple isn't it? Live, laugh, love.

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    1. Hi Suzanne - it seems a little trite - especially for those in tough times....but it's been a mainstay for me and a great reminder of what helps balance life, and how good life is - despite those tougher moments.

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  6. This is a wonderful way to look at life; at any age!

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    1. You're right Joanne - it's been a favourite reminder for me for a couple of decades now, and just seems to be a simple way to remind myself not to get too bogged down in things I really have no control over - except to choose my response.

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  7. Hi Leanne - Laugh, that's not something I do very often. However, I do watch light and humorous TV programmes and read such book and articles. But I am not the type who laughs very often. May be I should work on it. Laughter is also considered to have therapeutic properties.

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    1. Hi Pradeep - I think we laugh a lot less these days - especially men for some reason. And yes, I think recognizing the small happy moments - the ones that make us smile - will make us aware of even more of them - like having your son home after 5 years!

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  8. Hi, Leanne - I <3 your wish for us all to Live, Love, Laugh every single day. It is a perfect motto. I wish the very same for you in 2023 (and far beyond)!

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    1. Thank you so much - I think we all deserve to have some love and laughter in our lives - just having something to smile about each day is enough to carry us through isn't it? I choose to look for those happy moments every day and to be so grateful for them :)

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  9. Hi Leanne, this is such a good post to remind ourselves of all the little things that make us smile on a daily basis. I'm a big believer of looking for those little moments and try hard to live that way. Live, love, laugh is a great way to live and you've summed it up perfectly with your words and quotes. Thanks - I needed the reminder today!

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    1. Hi Deb - I've always loved how you blog about life, but your primary focus is on all the good parts. I think we've all had our fair share of down times, but to find those happy sunshiney spots in amongst it all is often what carries us through - and also gratitude for the life we have and the people we have in it. x

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  10. Such a lovely positive post. And my favourite part? Tiny happy things...

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    1. Yes I loved them too Jo - they reminded me of the whole looking for glimmers of joy thing from last year. No matter what life tosses at us, there are always moments of happiness.

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  11. I love this post Leanne. Last year in my year of happiness it became obvious to me that there were many small incidents every day that made me happy. I actually had more joy from the tiny things than the big ones.

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    1. I feel exactly the same way - you don't need large full-on gut busting happy moments to live a content and joyful life. You just need to recognize all those little snippets of goodness and be grateful for them and joy settles in around you.

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  12. I LOVE that paragraph about "do we overcomplicate happiness?" and I think the answer is a big YES. In general, it seems like happiness has become something unreachable...that it's a big feeling you "have to" have all the time and if you don't have it, you've failed in life or something. While for me, happiness is the little things, a collection of all those little moments, and even if life isn't perfect, you still have those.

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    1. Perfectly said Susanne - if we all rated our happiness on a social media scale, or on a big moment scale, we'd be constantly disappointed. When we take the time to slow down a little and appreciate all those happy little events each day, it gives us such a sense of being blessed doesn't it?

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  13. Amen to everything you said here, Leanne. My life motto is "Life, laugh, learn, and love." I've been keeping a sort of gratitude journal for awhile now, but I call it my 3 Good Things journal. Each evening I write down three good things that happened during the day. Most days they are three small things...like reading a good book, or hearing children giggling together, or taking a walk in the sunshine. Those small moments of joy make up most of our happiness in this life and are there even during the difficult times, if we just tune into them. Thank you for another joy inspiring post.

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    1. Hi Christie - I often do a similar thing as I go for my morning walk - just pausing my thoughts and reminding myself of how blessed I am to live somewhere safe, for lovely weather, for good friends, a home that's a haven, family peace and love.....and so much more. There's a lot of good in our lives if we take a moment to think about it and be grateful for it - and the more grateful we are, the happier we become.

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  14. I needed a reminder about little moments of joy. It's been a tough few weeks and my routines are all shot. Back to practicing gratitude, looking for moments of joy, and ignoring the shoulds.

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    1. Tough times tend to draw our focus away from the small joys of the day - we get caught up in the stress and pressure and the little things slip by. When we re-focus and remember to be grateful for the glimmers of happiness each day it helps balance out some of the less enjoyable parts. I hope things improve for you soon :)

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  15. I love how the "L" words are making their way into your life and staying. Laughing with my husband is one of our greatest joys. And we have so much to be grateful for as well. We are 'over the hill' now but finding these early days (I am 73, he is coming up to 74) are treating us reasonably kindly, even though we both had surgeries in 2022, we had great outcomes. Health becomes even more important as we want to remain as well as we can even with the limitation we have via our serious chronic conditions. Great to have your blog shared on Wednesday’s Words and Pics this week. Thank you so much for your support. I hope to see you next week too. Denyse.

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    1. Hi Denyse, age always brings with it some physical hiccups (big and small) and they can distract us from the enjoyable side of getting older. Long term relationships are so special - we share a laugh over silly little things that we thought were funny years ago and still make us smile (other people would just roll their eyes or be confused about our "in" jokes). It's something I really love about growing old with my lovely husband - and you obviously have the same connection. x

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  16. I really really enjoyed reading these inspiring words this morning. I want to focus more on enjoying the simple joys in each aspect of life throughout the day to be a happier/healthier me. Your words put it all in perspective about thinking of the positives & tiny happy things. #Weekendcoffeeshare Karen

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    1. Hi Karen - my life is a smallish life - I'm really not interested in living large.....and because of that, my joys are small ones (and so are my sorrows). Slowing down a little to acknowledge those little happy moments and to celebrate them makes me so content. I check in with myself and my husband regularly to see how our happy-o-meters are going - and it's always good when we're both feeling settled and content with this life we've been blessed with.

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  17. Leanne, great post. I'm not a New Year's resolution person, but I do pick a word for the year. Previous years I have picked words like transformation, hope, goals, health/happiness, and success. My word for this year is laughter!

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    1. Hi Shari - I think laughter is a great WOTY because I truly think we don't laugh anywhere near as much as we did when we were children. I love it when I'm taken by surprise by something that brings a laugh - it just brightens my day.

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  18. Hi Leanne, "Live, love, laugh" is a good approach to enjoy our time on earth. Thank you for your weekend coffee share.

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    1. Hi Natalie - I often come back to it because it's simple, straightforward, and a great reminder to not overcomplicate life.

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  19. Hi Leanne.
    Love your list of tiny happy things. Often it is the small things that bring the most joy.

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    1. I loved the list too and felt that I had to share it - sometimes we get so caught up in the day to day grind of life that we forget all those small glimmers of joy.

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  20. I love this post, Leanne!! And the Tiny Happy Things!

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    1. Hi Kathleen - those tiny happy things were such a great reminder to look for the glimmers of happiness that are all around us - we just need to adjust our focus sometimes.

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  21. I wish I'd had the wisdom to live lightly when I was younger. Your "unbecoming" metaphor resonates so much with me. I'm unbecoming a lot of what I used to be and gradually figuring out what to replace all that stuff with. Our bodies may fall apart, but age does have its benefits.

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    1. Hi Janet - I wish I'd known what I know now back when I was younger. I certainly would have been kinder to myself and not worried so much. I think I'd have been a lot more relaxed and more grateful if I'd had a sneak peak into the future and realized that things tend to work out in the end. All that worry........what a waste of time!

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  22. A beautiful post, Leanne. Have shared it with 3 internet colleagues with this comment " I follow this blogger and admire how she tackles negativity and nourishes positivity".

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    1. Oh Judith how lovely of you to share my post with your colleagues - I truly appreciate it and I hope they found a smile and some encouragement from it. I'm finding that the older I get, the more grateful I am and the happier I am with life. All the things that used to weigh me down are gradually sliding away and I'm choosing to be kinder to "me" and that is paying off big time - being kind to your heart and soul makes you a much easier person to be around!

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  23. So good Leanne. I'm 54, but I definitely feel the physical changes that come with age..lol. I just love your word of the year. I like that quote about happiness. So good. I need to save this post to re-read because it really resonates with me.

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    1. Hi Kirstin, I'm so glad you enjoyed my post - it's always good to remind ourselves of all the little happinesses in our lives, and that life is short so we have to make the most of all that comes with our journey. There's ups and downs - one brings ease and the other brings growth.....and I'm learning to be good with both.

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Thanks so much for your comment - it's where the connection begins.