WHY ALL THE HATE?

Why all the hate? Can't we choose kindness and not be so quick to criticize?
Really??? I mean Really???

SWEEPING STATEMENTS

A while ago a friend of mine sent me a link to the "Your Tattoos make you a Horrible Mother" facebook page. Really??? I mean Really??? It had over 17,000 likes - I'm not even sure how this kind of hating on people gets to be so popular. Apparently it was taken down not long afterwards, but another page has emerged to take its place.


There is even a post about FIS - Foetal Ink Syndrome; TITS (hmmm) Tattoo Induced Toxicity Syndrome - where the foetus or the mother's breast milk apparently absorbs ink from the mother's tattoos and this is a possible cause of autism and/or death.....Really???? I mean Really???

WHAT'S OUR RESPONSE?

There are a lot of vehement responses to the various posts (including a facebook page called Your judgment against mothers with tattoos make you a horrible person), refuting all the "data" mentioned, because it is a beyond-ridiculous way to judge someone's mothering ability. Not to mention lumping every tattooed woman under the umbrella of jailbird, STD carrier, druggie, baby killer and goodness-knows-what. How a tattoo has any bearing on your mothering skills is beyond me. Lucky for these shining examples of perfect children pictured above, their un-tattooed mothers got it all right - including the call to "shun the gun" and "think, don't ink". 


There is really no way we can know the heart, the intentions, or the circumstances of someone

According to the fount of knowledge who set this page up: "Children of tattooed mothers can only look forward to, provided they even survive childhood, a life of drug and alcohol abuse, ankle monitors, debilitating carnival ride accidents, and bitching at people like me on the internet." All those poor children who are destined to die before reaching adulthood because their mothers got a butterfly tattooed on their ankle to celebrate a milestone (apparently that butterfly signifies she is a flighty and unstably dangerous person). Not to mention the ones who have mothers who loved them so much that they had their offspring's names tattooed on their shoulder......do they put a line through each name as that child sinks hopelessly into a life of drug and alcohol abuse?

WHAT'S HAPPENING IN OUR WORLD?

When did we become so vitriolic in our judgement of other people's choices? Surely it is no-one else's business whether you choose to have a tattoo or not, and there is enough guilt tripping placed on mothers without adding a bucket load of weirdly researched information that condemns them even further. I'm sure most children don't give a hoot if their mum or dad has a tattoo (or ten) - they have more important things to worry about.....like what interesting things has mum put in my school lunch box today? Or what play equipment will I use at recess? Or will I get invited to my classmate's birthday party?

COULD WE JUST TRY KINDNESS?

Let's all be a little kinder to each other and stop shoveling hate onto people for the sake of being self righteous. I would like to think that kindness and acceptance are more important than fitting into somebody's picture of what is their version of a good parent. It also applies to those who foist their opinions onto others about politics, food choices, exercise regimes, marriage rights, and so on and so forth.

Can we just live and let others live their lives in peace?




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22 comments

  1. To jump off from your post I found so many people shocked at what a strict parent I am. I'm not overly strict – – within the boundaries I've drawn in sharpie she may do whatever she wants :-) – – but there are rules. I have so many tattoos. I have a full leg sleeve from hip to ankle. I think it's the tattoos which makes others initially/immediately think permissive

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    1. It's so strange how we make immediate judgments with no depth to them isn't it Carla. I LOVE your tattoo - I admire it every time it shows up in one of your posts (and I also love how you parent that beautiful daughter of yours!)

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  2. Gahh! We humans are so weird. We'll judge about anything!

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    1. It seems to be a really negative character trait that a lot of the human race shares Diane :(

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  3. Unfortunately out sound bite, social media world gives us all a chance to be Judge Judy although most of us don't weigh our judgements as carefully.

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    1. There seems to be the need to jump to conclusions before thinking about things from other people's perspective now days Brenda - a sad fallout of our instant gratification generation.

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  4. craziness. My first thought would be that the group name was satire. Why would somebody go through all that trouble just to crack on other people?

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    1. Beats me Jeremy - but it's vitriolic enough to have a basis of real antipathy. I've seen so much hate spread about over the last year or so and I'm so tired of it all - where is the grace?

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  5. There are SO SO SO many other things to protest than tattoos. And the crazy statement that the kids won't survive. Wow.

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    1. I know! And the fact that there are so many people who are happy to jump on the judging bandwagon with absolutely no idea what they're talking about!

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  6. I'm not a big fan of tattoos for myself but would never think a person would be a bad parent because of it. My son has an armful and he's a great guy. Sheesh! Some people really amaze me.

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    1. Me too Rebecca - tattoos are so mainstream today that I'm surprised people would come up with as much vitriol as this group manages to generate.

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  7. I cannot believe that tattoo statement. Then again, my middle daughter feels close to that... especially as it pertains to the many tattoos of her sisters. But at least she doesn't spread such hatred online. I'm so sick and tired of hate and judgmental people. Everyone needs to pull the darn plank out of their own eyes.

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    1. My point exactly Lisa! Why is hate and judgement the first response today? Why don't we aim to give people the benefit of the doubt and show some love and acceptance?

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  8. My perfect grandchildren have a mother with tattoos (my daughter). She is a wonderful mother and daughter in every way. Although I do admit that when she got her first tattoo in college, I was less than thrilled. I don't understand people who have time to get on social media and make whole Facebook pages criticizing other's choices.

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    1. The whole tattoo thing is so irrelevant to parenting that this fb page just blew my mind Cathy. But there is so much hatred out there and name calling and judgement - especially with all the American politics atm - it just saddens me.

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  9. I'm so sick of the way people are treating each other. If they devoted their time and energy to their own issues, the world would be a better place.

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    1. My sentiments exactly Lois - why not default to kindness and acceptance rather than the need to judge and make your beliefs more valuable than someone else's?

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  10. Yikes! If I had known tattoos could do all that a I would have raised my children differently . . . now they are God loving, considerate, kind, compassionate, brilliant, well-adjusted adults �� Then again, I do have two autistic sons, but wait - I had them before I got any tattoos, soooo -

    It makes me sad to see such awful things. I ran across a Facebook group calling for the extermination of all autistics. It broke my heart to see the number of likes it had received, I could only stomach a few comments before I clicked off the page. I wish kindness was as contagious as ignorance and ugliness seems to be. I suppose the rest of us just need to keep spreading it around until it infects as many as it can ❤️

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    1. I can't believe that fb page you mentioned - people are beyond disgusting at times. Social media seems to give them an outlet for their ugliness and it draws others who feel the same. I think being love and light as much as possible is the only response - trying to argue with people like this is a waste of time.

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  11. Yes, it's very troubling. It reminds me of the Roman audiences watching Christians being thrown to the lions. Ugly stuff going on.

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  12. What!!!!! Noooooo that's just so wrong. Why would someone judge like that. I have a whole bunch of tattoos and in my humble opinion my kids are awesome. My son is off to a land far, far away to study Psychology and my daughter is one of the kindest most together human beings I have ever met. They're not big fans of my tats, but my body art has had no impact what so ever on them. Shoooo I'm shocked that in this day and age someone can be so judgmental. Perhaps she/he had a bad experience with someone who has tattoos and still needs to work through the trauma.

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