5 TOUGH QUESTIONS I'VE NEVER ASKED MYSELF

Going into 2018 I thought I'd ask myself a few tough questions

MY TOP FIVE QUESTIONS

My husband posted a Facebook link to an interesting article the other day. It was "50 Tough Questions You Never Ask Yourself, But Should" by Marla Tabaka. Fifty questions are way too many for me to get my head around, and a lot of them didn't really apply to me, but at least half of them were worth giving more than a passing thought to.

As anyone who reads my blog knows, I'm a big fan of the Magic Number 5 so I picked my top five questions from her list. Four of them ask for three things and one sums it all up. That was about as far as my Midlife brain could stretch after a few weeks of being in holiday mode! So, on that note here we go with my Top 5 Tough Questions I've Never Asked Myself....

#1   WHAT ARE MY TOP THREE VALUES?

  • Authenticity - being true to myself and being surrounded by "real" people.
  • Loyalty - trusting the people I associate with, because I know they have my back.
  • Kindness - giving and receiving goodness and compassion - shining my light.

#2   WHAT ARE THREE THINGS I CAN DO REGULARLY TO REDUCE STRESS?

  • Maintain strong boundaries - not getting sucked down into other people's drama.
  • Reduce perfectionism - giving myself grace and allowing myself to make mistakes.
  • Lower my expectations - of myself and the people I care about - we're only human.

#3   WHAT ARE THREE THINGS I WANT TO PAY CLOSER ATTENTION TO IN 2018?

  • My work/life balance - I let the drama at work overwhelm me in 2017 - never again!
  • My marriage - as empty nesters, we need to be each other's cheer squad and support
  • My fitness - my weight is doing the Midlife creep and I intend to reverse that in 2018

#4   IF I HAD A REALISTIC MAGIC WAND, WHAT WOULD BE MY TOP THREE WISHES?

(These will be my personal ones - so I'll leave out world peace etc!)

  • To deepen and strengthen my relationships - investing in my husband, family and friends
  • To find satisfaction in my work life - maintaining boundaries and stepping away from drama!
  • To maintain and improve my health and fitness - back to stopping that slow increase in weight

#5   WHAT IS THE SINGLE, MOST SIGNIFICANT CHANGE I CAN MAKE IN 2018?

I'd like to become more intentional. To approach the areas I've mentioned above with a sense of positivity and being proactive, rather than reacting or not trying to improve the status quo. The saying "God helps those who help themselves" has a lot of truth to it. I can't sit back and wait for life to happen to me, I want to tackle things and see positive change in 2018.

Your vision will become clear when you look into your own heart - Carl Jung

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Are any of these questions relevant to you? Perhaps you could check out the other 45 questions and pick a few of your own to answer? I like the idea of challenging myself to be proactive rather than reactive as I launch into 2018. There is always so much potential if we want to be brave and step out of our comfort zones.

Going into 2018 I thought I'd ask myself a few tough questions

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51 comments

  1. Hi, Leanne - You are not kidding - these are tough questions! I checked out the link of the full 50 questions and I like the five that you chose. I need to remind myself to read your posts when I have nothing else to do immediately afterwards...so I have time to reflect on the thought-provoking questions that you pose. Thank you for sharing these.

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    1. I hope you tackle a few of the questions Donna - I found some didn't apply, but the ones that I attempted brought me back to the same key points to work on this year.

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  2. Wow...these are tough...I'm going to have a look at the whole 50...& hope that some of those are easier to answer than these ones!

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    1. I don't think they were titled "tough" for nothing Jo - it certainly got me thinking about some areas of my life!

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  3. Great questions Leanne but like you I don't think I could handle 50 all at once. I love the ones you have chosen because now I'm off to think about my answers! Have a great week. xx

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    1. I thought 50 was a big ask too Sue - that's why I narrowed it down to five - that seems to be my workable number for lots of different posts these days!

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  4. I like your take on these questions Leanne. You’ve been honest and clear in your answers and I love the word intentional! I can relate to many of your responses and might even sit down and ask myself these questions. Thanks for another thought provoking post.

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    1. I'm finding that being intentional and in the moment are two key areas I need to focus more on Deb - questions like these give me a starting point.

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  5. I have gifted myself this year to scrutinize my life and ask all of the hard questions. All of them are placable. I need to emerge from this 365 with better insight into my life and what I want.

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    1. That's what I liked about your post today Carla - the fact that you're using a tough time to ask some of those questions and not letting it be for nothing.

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  6. These are thought provoking Leanne. You answered deftly and with INTENTION!

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    1. That's the plan anyway Haralee - trying to get to the bottom of what I can take into 2018 to learn and grow.

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  7. Great questions! They are indeed tough ones, but I am definitely going to answer them for myself :)

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    1. I hope you do Maureen - I thought they were a good jumping off point for the new year.

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  8. I admit - these are tough questions, but as January is not only the beginning of a new year, it is my birthday month and what I consider to be my own personal New Year...so, I always take the time for self-reflection....these questions (and your answers) are a beautiful start.

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    1. Happy birthday month to you! And I hope that you find some inspiration from answering these questions - I liked that they narrowed down my focus to what was really important to me.

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  9. Contagious stress (i.e. stress from other people's drama) is just as harmful as your own stress. Keeping toxic people at bay is one thing we all can do regularly to reduce stress in 2018. Great post!

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    1. I couldn't agree more Darlene - after experiencing it myself, I've realized I need to put very strong boundaries in place for my own mental health this year.

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  10. These are very thought provoking questions indeed.

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    1. Thanks so much - I hope they give people something to think about - they certainly got my brain ticking over!

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  11. These are all great questions that lead to deep thoughts about what we truly want in life. I read something earlier about a "life audit" that really struck a cord with me.

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    1. Yes, Sue posted about doing a life audit - very full on and a great way to really get serious about the year ahead. I went a bit simpler because I know my limitations :)

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  12. Great questions and intention for 2018. Loved your thoughtfulness with the answers. My intention for 2018 is Intentional Growth with a gang of friends.

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    1. I saw your post about your encore life coaching Rebecca - it's so great that you've decided to reinvent yourself rather than sitting back and doing nothing for the next few decades :)

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  13. These certainly are important questions, Leanne. I'm going to take some time to answer the five you chose for now, and then maybe I'll peek at the other 45. I may even write a similar post with my answers. If I do, I'll be sure to link back to your post, as my inspiration. Thanks for getting me thinking (on a Monday no less)!

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    1. I'd love you to answer the questions and write a post about your interpretation Christie. It's always interesting to see what others are learning and applying in their lives and I'd be honoured to have a link on your blog x

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  14. Great questions, Leanne. I want to write down each one and think about them.

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    1. I hope you do Laurie - they might inspire you in completely different areas than mine did for me :)

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  15. Boy, these questions really are thought-provoking! I probably would have a hard time answering them too. But it is a good thing to muse about getting started on a new year.

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    1. There's nothing like having something to ruminate over to keep your brain active Florence - it certainly helps mine :)

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  16. That's so interesting. As I read your answers I was wondering about how I would answer for myself. You're right, I'm not sure I've ever really asked myself any of these things.

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    1. I do that too Melissa - wondering how I'd answer questions I see elsewhere - I love when something gets your brain ticking away.

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  17. Excellent questions. Really thought provoking. Pinned.

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    1. Thanks Sarah - I appreciate you pinning it :)

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  18. Intentional is a word that I've seen so many of our age group mention for going forward into this year. Some excellent and thought provoking questions!

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    1. I think we're finally twigging to the fact that life is short Janet and if we don't start living with purpose then we'll waste the time we have left to us.

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  19. These are great questions and I think we all should ask those Thanks for the inspiration.
    Maria

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    1. Thanks Maria - I hope they gave you something to think about (they certainly did for me!)

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  20. Judging by the comments here you certainly chose not only an interesting topic but 5 great questions. I am going to look at the 50. I sometimes continue to glide along and then go down 'rabbit holes' of self-doubt and criticism so I need some strengthening of my thoughts and intentions.
    Thank you for linking up for #lifethisweek 3/52. Next week’s optional prompt is “What is Kindness?”

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    1. I found the 50 really interesting Denyse - they didn't all apply directly to me but there were lots that made me stop and think about life in general and how I was handling it - being proactive is so important isn't it?

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  21. Wow, those are some tough questions and I'd have to do some reflection on them. I really like the idea of 3 things to pay attention to for the year. Faith, Family, and Fun would be my top three since I don't have much work life balance at the moment. Here's to a successful 2018!

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    1. Your three F's are perfect Toni - and I hope the work/life balance thing smooths out over 2018 too x

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  22. Leanne, lots to think about here - I can't even look at a list of 50!

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    1. I know Jean - 50 blew me away, but narrowing it down to a do-able number certainly gave me something to ponder upon :)

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  23. I love these questions. I often like to contemplate questions like this early in the morning as I start my day. I like the one about what you are going to pay attention to in 2018. Pay attention to is a nice phrase- much more thoughtful than goals.

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  24. I liked it too Michele - it gives me a starting point but isn't really putting any pressure on me to perform. It's good to be a little bit intentional about how we live our lives or the days just slip by and nothing changes.

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  25. Very thoughtful Leanne, displaying your gift to put into words what I could not. I like the thought to 'be proactive rather than reactive.' This will always win in all the areas that you mention.
    Kathleen
    Blogger's Pit Stop

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    1. Thanks Kathleen - I'm sure you could articulate it just as well as I can - it's just being challenged to do so (and I never step away from a good challenge!)

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  26. Our readers like this post so we will feature it on The Blogger's Pit Stop

    Kathleen
    Blogger's Pit Stop

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    1. Fantastic news Kathleen - so pleased it resonated with your readers x

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  27. One of the comments you made that resonates most with me is building/strengthening your relationship with your husband. As I type this comment, my hubs and I have been sitting side by side on the couch on our laptops without saying more than two words to one another for several hours. No bueno! I am going to unplug right now so we can concentrate on each other. Fabulous, thought-provoking post. Much to think about here.

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