WHEN LIFE USED TO BE HURRIED
The first half of my life was always lived in a hurry. My days were packed
to the brim with work, or stuff to do when I wasn't at work - you
know......cooking, housework, grocery shopping, socialising, volunteering,
church, hobbies, and all the appointments (hairdresser, dentist, doctor
etc). For a long time there was also all the "kid stuff" - school
activities, after-school activities, sports, friends, youth group, and all
the other responsibilities that come with being a good parent.
Back in those "good old days" there was rarely the opportunity to slow down
- because all those responsibilities needed to be done - and done well.
There was very little flexibility, and every day was packed full from when
the alarm went off in the morning, until I slid into bed at night. They were
great times, but always SO busy. Even after the kids left home and the
parenting work disappeared, life still continued at a galloping pace. I
loved living a busy life back then, but it's not how I wanted to
continue in the second half of my life. So what did I do to move from rushed
to relaxed, from hurried to unhurried?
HERE'S 5 STEPS I TOOK TO BECOME UNHURRIED:
1. I RETIRED FROM PAID WORK
This was the biggest catalyst for change in my life. Leaving my horrible
job and deciding not to return to the 9-5 workforce completely turned my
life around. I went from a fully scheduled week with everything slotted into
a specific day and time, to a life of days that were mine to decide what to
do with. I needed time to recover, I needed to rebuild
my resilience, I needed to find
a new normal, and when I did all those things, I found that I had no desire at all to
go back to the busy life I was leading. I wanted peace, quiet, and
calm.....and I've chosen to build my life around those three choices.
2. I TURNED OFF MY ALARM CLOCK
I've never been a morning person. I am much happier seeing a sunset than a
sunrise. I don't enjoy getting up early and I don't naturally wake up
feeling revved and ready to go at 6.30am. So, I used to have to set my alarm
every morning to be up for work, or for the family, or for the other
commitments I had scheduled around my work days. I still have that clock
next to the bed, but I use it to check the time - not to be jostled out of
bed at the crack of dawn. I wake when I'm ready to, I take my time and
commence my day at my own pace, I schedule appointments later in the morning
so I don't have to rush around getting ready. Occasionally the alarm is
needed - but so rarely these days, and that's been an unexpected
bonus.
3. I KEEP MY COMMITMENTS FLEXIBLE
My life didn't stop when I left work, I had lots of other interests and
commitments that I fitted in around my work days. Once my weeks were freed
up, I reassessed what was on my calendar and made decisions about how I
wanted my days to look like. Covid threw an extra spanner in the works by
stopping everything in its tracks, but that gave me the added incentive to
be careful what
I chose to allow into my life
once things started to get back to normal. I added back some of my pre-covid
commitments, but I also made sure that I choose to do them later in the
morning so I don't have to be in a hurry to get there. There's no pressure,
I can spread my day out and fit everything in without cramming appointments
on top of each other.
4. I HAVE ONE DAY EACH WEEK WITH NO PLANS
As well as being careful about how much I include in my to-do list for the
week, I always aim to have one day with nothing planned. On that day I still
go for my morning walk, but then I'm home for the rest of the day. I can
kick back in my comfy clothes and read, blog, do a jigsaw,
make some art, potter around....anything that takes my fancy and involves being in my
own headspace on my own timetable, being unhurried and happy. I think
there's a
little bit of introvert
in me that is just happy having downtime in my own space.
5. I FOLLOW OTHER UNBUSY PEOPLE ONLINE
I don't use Instagram or most other social media - I don't want to compete or
compare - so I keep my Facebook feed as my main way to follow people - and
I'm very careful who I choose to allow into that feed. I follow quite a few Unbusy, simple living, slow-life bloggers - a few of
them include
Becoming Unbusy,
Happy Simple Mom,
No Sidebar,
Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life, and
Simple Slow Lovely, and they inspire me to keep pursuing a lifestyle that brings me
contentment. I've given up trying to justify it to those who love being busy
- I've also stopped being upset when they "scold" me online and assume I'm
missing out because I don't want what they have. I'm getting much better at
saying "Okay" and moving on.
UNHURRIED AND HAPPY
Unhurried living may not suit everyone, but it certainly suits me. I feel
so privileged to live the life I have now. It took a major upheaval and a
lot of soul searching to be where I am today and I never forget that. I no
longer feel stressed, or overwhelmed, or rushed, or pressured. I don't allow
others to make me feel guilty for wanting this life - no more justifying
myself to anyone - (that's another bonus of Midlife!) I'm just quietly and
pleasantly living life on my own terms these days and I'm beyond grateful
that I've been given this time well before I ever expected it.
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Are you living life at the pace you feel comfortable with? Are you grateful
to be where you are right now? Or do you need to make some changes? Midlife
is different for everyone - some want to live it at full speed, others are
content to meander gently through - each to their own, but for me it's all
about being unhurried, peaceful, content, and full of gratitude for the life
I've been so unexpectedly blessed with.
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