feeling valued.......or not!


midlife blog cresting the hill
What about me???

You know that feeling from your younger days when you broke up with a boyfriend and there was the relief but also the regret? Well that's a bit what leaving my job has been like. The kicker is that it feels like my metaphoric boyfriend has replaced me already!

I put in my resignation less than a fortnight ago and the practice manager asked me not to tell my boss yet because he was going away for two weeks and she didn't want him coming up with the great idea that when he returned he could put his latest lady love into my job.

Not a problem - one less thing to deal with and who knows, maybe there'd be some sort of job share offered or a gradual walk out the door while they looked for another person to fill my spot.....after eight years of my loyal and faithful service. Well, that wasn't the case at all! Our main office is an hour or so drive away but within days she was down here - I thought she'd come to discuss my exit plan.... but no, she was down to interview someone for my job!

I totally understand that she needed to get the wheels moving and have it all in place but I just didn't realize how completely replaceable I was! I was hoping for a little sadness and "oh what are we going to do without you??!" and instead it's "see you later - don't forget to drop your uniform off before you go." I must admit that they are taking me out for a lovely lunch and she is apologetic about the need to fill my office chair so quickly, but man! I feel a bit miffed about it all!

So next week is my last couple of days on the job, along with my see-you-later-don't forget to leave your key when you go-lunch and then I close the door on eight or so years of my life. It's a little surreal at the time being and it kind of makes me wonder what the future holds. Time will tell and I'm still not sorry I pulled the plug - just a little bemused about the new metaphoric girlfriend who's taken my place. It must happen fairly often in jobs and in relationships because I found out there is actually a term for how I'm feeling:

midlife blog cresting the hill

12 comments

  1. Well I learned a new word today and I have probably suffered from it without knowing the tag to put on it. Hold your head up and enjoy the last days and lunch, make them a bit jealous of what you are going to. Even if you don't know, it will be something good.
    Kathleen
    Fridays Blog Booster Party

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    1. Thanks Kathleen - I'm still glad I'm leaving (and I won't have to be there when my boss gets back and finds a new person installed in the office!)

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  2. I get where you're coming from, Leanne.I think we all suffer from a little bit of athazagoraphobia from time to time. Well, at least I know I do! When I left my last job, they ended up dissolving my position and that felt really weird. Enjoy your new beginning!

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    1. Thanks Kelsey - I will take consolation in the fact that I haven't been dissolved!

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  3. In the rat race of corporations, we are all expendable. Our value ends when we are not able to produce or generate profit anymore. At least, that is how we are treated.
    It is sad to hear that it happened to you, but unfortunately, you are not an exception.
    Anyways, it means that you took the right step resigning.

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    1. thanks Debbie - I understand why it was done, but it would have been nice to feel like I was hard to replace rather than another notch in the doorpost!

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  4. Yes the new girlfriend feeling, it happens but doesn't feel good or is it appreciated at all! Every now and then I hear some one talk about all they do at their job that no one else could do and the company would be lost if they ever left and I listen but I know they are wrong.We are all replaceable. Athazagoraphobia baby!

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    1. It's so true Haralee - I would have said that my skill set was fairly specific to my job - but that turned out to be a bit of self delusion......moving on!

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  5. My Husby always likens leaving a job to pulling one's arm out of a pail of water. You really can't tell you've been there. I always hoped to be remembered at least a little bit - maybe just as that goofy girl who was always singing and never could remember the punchlines of jokes. But remembered just the same.

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    1. Diane - you sing too! I sing all the time (fairly out of key but that adds to the fun) and hopefully I will be remembered now and then in passing...

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  6. Darn...what is it about corperate people and when do they misplace their soul?

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