A TO Z CHALLENGE - W FOR WHEN YOU LOSE

#AtoZChallenge - 2018 and W for When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

MY A-Z CHALLENGE - W FOR WHEN YOU LOSE

The next letter of my A to Zen of Life (via the Dalai Lama) is W for When you lose, don’t lose the lesson. This is an important one because losing is always seen as a negative, but if you turn it around slightly you can see the positive aspects - lessons learned, wisdom gained, and knowing what didn't work so you can focus on what will.

BEING A GROWN-UP

We're not in kindergarten any more where losing the egg and spoon race was a major crisis that resulted in tears and perceived humiliation. No, we're big people now and we can lose gracefully and graciously. We can take a hit, get knocked down and get back up again. We can even go through that same process several times and still keep getting back on our feet and trying again.

Learning to deal with failure and being less than we'd hoped for is part of the adulting process. We have to get our heads around the fact that life won't always go our way, that there will be times when we miss out or get it wrong. Some of these experiences may be consequences of our actions, some might be unfair and undeserved. Regardless, we get back up, dust ourselves off, and get back into the hurly burly of life. 

Getting knocked down in life is a given... getting up and moving forward is a choice.

BUILDING CHARACTER

Each time we weather a failure or a setback we build resilience and confidence in ourselves. If we let losses get us down, if we give up when the going gets tough, then we never grow. We develop character by toughing things out, by finding solutions to difficult situations, by learning to be the bigger person and forgiving when someone lets us down or doesn't measure up to the hopes we had for them.

Life is messy, there are wins and there are losses. We need to celebrate the victories and acknowledge the defeats without letting them define us. We aren't our highs and we aren't our lows, we are a combination of all that life throws at us. Well rounded people take the good and the bad and learn lessons and gain wisdom - they don't throw in the towel when life gets difficult - they battle on and push through. Success is waiting if we're willing to take a few bumps and bruises along the way.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Do you give up when the going gets tough? Do you let life's losses get to you? Or are you a striver who moves forward and rides out the storm? I hope I'm someone who has risen above the setbacks and I'd like to think they've made me who I am today - resilient, positive, proactive, and able to face whatever life throws at me.


#AtoZChallenge - 2018 and W for When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.


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#AtoZChallenge - 2018 and I'm tackling the A to Zen of Life (via the Dalai Lama)

21 comments

  1. Hari OM
    Defiitely a striver here. I like that word 'resilience'. It has a bit of fibre about it... YAM xx

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  2. Ditto - I'm a striver. Sometimes weary about always striving, but a striver nevertheless. By the way, absolutely perfect image for this post, Leanne. A brilliant connection to make.

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  3. I used to have a very hard time coping with defeat. Now, I know it's part of life and if I make it into something useful, something I can learn from, then it's really not a loss.
    Facing Cancer with Grace

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  4. I'm a striver, not always resilient and your post made me think. I don't mind losing in say a race, or a challenge or at cards, but sometimes when the stakes are high and I really do want to win then I can revert to being a child and feel battered and bruised if I don't ;)

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  5. Leanne I love your W title. I seem to have increased my resilience as I've aged. I do have my moments of wanting to give up, but most times seem to be able to get myself back up again. There are times thought that I still feel like stamping my feet like a two year old.

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  6. Hi, Leanne - I agree that losses can teach us valuable lessons. The most difficult boss for whom I ever worked, always strove to ensure that he 'won' ahead of everyone else. Although he made work a very fragmented place, it is from him that I learned some of my most valuable work and life lessons.

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  7. Couldn't agree more. SO many lessons in adversity - in whatever form it may take. I think we can allow ourselves a little time to mope but then to dust ourselves on and move forward and look for the lessons in the experience. :-) #TeamLovinLife

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  8. My middle name starts with D. For Determination I sometimes think, rather than Dawn!

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  9. I never give up Leanne and I think it is a shame that children today aren’t taught that it is ok to lose as long as you have tried your best. Today they don’t even score football games because they don’t want the children to be upset. How will they cope when they grow up and realize that it isn’t always happiness and unicorns

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  10. Gosh this was exactly what I needed to read right now when I have a sense of being let down. Yes, a striver who surges ahead even when things don't go the way they have been planned. Excellent post.

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  11. Fortunately I'm a very persistent person and generally don't give up easily on any challenge. I have had some hard knocks in life, but after each one I've come back stronger and wiser. I believe setbacks and struggles are part of life because as we know "life was not meant to be easy". #TeamLovinLife

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  12. I just had to write an essay about the importance of teaching children to embrace failure as a necessary step (or 10) on the path to success. It can be hard for some kids to lose, and it is a tragedy when that fear of losing makes children stop trying. Not just children--me as well! Melanie's Stories

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  13. I have been lucky enough that life hasn't handed me many lemons so far, so I can't really tell. I like to think that I can master "regular losses" fairly well.

    Thank you for another great post. What am I gonna do next week without your great advice and input?

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  14. Hi Leanne! I completely agree that even with things look the bleakest there is always a silver lining. Sometimes it takes a while to find but if we look for it, it will always show up. I have a large print in my living room titled, "The Sun Always Comes" and I do my best to remember that every day. Thanks for the reminder! ~Kathy

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  15. Oh yes, I'm a striver to the point I wish I would slow down at times! Thanks for your post as always, Leanne.

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  16. Definitely important lesson to teach kids. I'd like to think I've come out on top of the thankfully few setbacks I've had so far over the past 63 years.

    Janet’s Smiles

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  17. I agree with you Leanne life is messy but riding it out is the only option to me.I have a favourite saying "this too shall pass" and try to hang in there when things get tough. Great one for W - you're nearly at the end of A-Z, how are you feeling??

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  18. Get back into the "hurly burly" of life. I must admit I've never heard that expression, but it made me smile. Gaining when we lose is a much more helpful perspective, indeed!
    Kimberly
    Passing Down the Love #AtoZ

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  19. Ah, this is an important one Leanne cos we all lose sometime/s. And it's helpful to put that positive spin on it. And I'm a big 'lessons learned' person so like that approach. (As long as the lesson is constructive....) #teamlovinlife

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  20. Do you give up when the going gets tough? No, steel myself and strive harder.
    Do you let life's losses get to you? No, I let the past be in the past. I learn from them, and look ahead and move forward.

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  21. I look at myself as more as a survivor than a striver. But in my opinion getting back up and moving on is the only answer.

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Thanks so much for your comment - it's where the connection begins.