WHY I'M CHOOSING TO BE UNBUSY IN RETIREMENT

Are you tired of hearing about how busy everyone is in retirement? Why not focus on becoming un-busy and become part of the unbusy and slow movements that more people are choosing every day? #slow #unbusy #retirement

BECOMING UNBUSY IN RETIREMENT

A while ago I was asked to contribute to a collaborative post on Keeping Busy in Retirement and I started thinking about all the things I'm doing to fill my days now that I'm not working. But, underneath that first impulse to prove I'm "busy, busy, busy" was a different desire - one that was saying "You know what? I don't want to be busy all the time, I don't want to fill every day with a multitude of planned events." My soul wants to be Un-Busy and it's when I become un-busy that I feel more centred and more at peace.

I admire those retirees who have bucket lists to tick off, travel plans to fulfill, sights to see, jobs to do, programs to complete, artistic endeavours to pursue.....but that's not me, I'm happy just being in my own space, doing things at my own speed, in my own time. I'm savouring the un-busy-ness of my life, I shared a little about it in a previous post where I wrote: 

Every day is different, but every day is full - just a different kind of fullness, a different pace, a different approach to how my week flows.


For so long, I felt I always needed to be moving. Doing. Now I'm giving myself permission to be un-busy. #unbusy #lifequotes

THE UNBUSY MOVEMENT

I've been following the Becoming Unbusy Facebook page for a long time. I love the quotes there and often share them on my own Facebook page. I've always been a big fan of minimalism and being clutter-free (even before these concepts became mainstream) and un-busyness is really about decluttering your lifestyle. For me it means taking away the noise and the demands, it's letting go of the expectation that you should always be doing something "productive". It's choosing to believe that it's okay to not have the whole day planned out and full of commitments - just allowing it to flow in whatever direction it chooses to take.

Most of my days have a component of order to them - chores still need to be done, dates need to be kept, outside commitments need to be followed through on, but that's only part of each day - the rest is unbusy - allowing the day to unfold at its own pace without feeling like I have to justify my time. I'm learning to let go of the need to prove myself to other people - to make retirement look productive, and instead I'm living it on my own terms and at my own pace.


Stop the glorification of busy. Busy, in and of itself, is not a badge of honour. #unbusy #lifequotes

THE SLOW MOVEMENT

Another Facebook page I follow is Simple Slow Lovely which is full of reminders to slow down and to stop the rush that is such a part of life these days. I loved the title of the page and the concept behind it - that it's okay to live slower, to calm the pace down and to take time to enjoy the moment, the day, the event, the company of others. I don't need to be in a hurry, I can slow the pace down a little and step out of the rat race.

I begin every day with a walk around our neighbourhood. I do it primarily because I need to move more (darn that declining Midlife metabolism!) but I also do it because I love the quiet and the time to be away from distractions. I don't take my phone, I don't listen to music or podcasts, I don't look for photo opportunities, I don't time myself or compete with myself to go faster or further; I just walk, and think, and pray, and muse about life and how things are going. I love the peace, the serenity, and the lack of rush and purpose. It's so liberating to be cut off from distractions for a little while.


slow living is about creating a life with fewer obligations and more flexibility #slowliving #lifequotes

WHY CHOOSE TO BE UNBUSY IN RETIREMENT? 

I don't think we give un-busyness enough credit, we're all so busy glorifying busy-ness and thinking that it's the yardstick to measure our retirement by. There's almost a competition amongst retirees as to who's doing the most, who's got the longest list ticked off for the month, who's achieving the most with their non-working life. I don't want to join the competition, I don't need the pressure to prove myself anymore. If you feel like you're tired of the hamster wheel you're on, then maybe you're ready to be unbusy in retirement too.

Perhaps it's time to slow down a little, put your phone away, stop scheduling every day full of activities, and start being flexible and allowing yourself some down time. When you let go of the need to always be "doing" and start enjoying the concept of "being" it opens up a whole new way of life. Yes, it's slower and there's less to justify how you're spending your day, but it's so relaxing to go with the flow. Give it a try and see what you think, retirement's not a competition - it's a new way of life, and taking your foot off the accelerator pedal now and then is so rewarding.


WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Are you living (or looking forward to) an unbusy retirement? Or are you a mover and shaker who doesn't want to slow down yet? Have you considered the UnBusy or Slow Movements and the lifestyle they advocate?


RELATED POSTS


Are you tired of hearing about how busy everyone is in retirement? Why not focus on becoming un-busy and become part of the unbusy and slow movements that more people are choosing every day? #slow #unbusy #retirement
Are you tired of hearing about how busy everyone is in retirement? Why not focus on becoming un-busy and become part of the unbusy and slow movements that more people are choosing every day? #slow #unbusy #retirement

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Cresting the Hill - a blog for Midlife (Middle Aged / 50+) women who want to thrive

78 comments

  1. Hi, Leanne - Even though my life has currently been on a very active streak, I do get this post completely. When I first retired, one of my DILs asked me what I wanted to do during retirement. My short answer was 'nothing". She probed with more questions. Most of my responses went like this: "no, no thank you, not really, hopefully not and nope." So I did start off my retirement quite slowly. I didn't even have an email account for awhile!

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    1. Hi Donna - I think I like the idea of balance - busyness offset by unbusyness. I'm so tired of running full steam ahead with the idea of trying to validate retirement. Maybe I'll want more down the track, but for now I'm really enjoying being in charge of my days rather than my days being in charge of me :)

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  2. I had to bookmark this post and promise myself to read it every single day, sometimes twice a day that's how this post hit me this morning. It was really difficult for me when my drs deemed me disabled due to cancer. I had worked my whole life it seemed and then suddenly no work. Which for a moment was fine but then I felt I needed to fill every waking moment with something, anything. I was used to doing... Now I need to allow myself the flow of being unbusy and this post will be my reminder! Thank you so much, Leanne.

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    1. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I felt the same way when work abruptly stopped for me, like I needed to justify my time by filling it with "things to do". When I took a step back and gave myself the grace to breathe and to be allowed to enjoy a slower pace, it all started to make so much more sense. I feel like we need to be kinder to ourselves and stop worrying about proving anything - just letting ourselves "be" is so important.

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  3. Excellent advice, Leanne! There's nothing wrong with being un-busy. Life is short and should be savoured. :) I was a burnt-out, corporate workaholic, who got axed during the recession of 1992, then started a home-based pet care business. It too was busy for many years (7 days a week, all hours of the day and night). To restore my sanity, I dropped the home cat visits and dog walking services (major blow to income, but sometimes, other things are more important). I consider myself "semi-retired" now, just taking a few dogs into my home at a time, while their owners are away. There's plenty of down time, and I'm not bored in the least, nor do I feel guilty. "Go with the flow" is a good mantra. :) Thanks for the reminder and Happy Retirement!

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    1. Thanks Debbie - I think we like the idea of being busy and it gives us some sort of credibility with others, but surely once we're past 50 we're allowed to be a little bit kinder to ourselves. I feel like we're in the second half of life and every day it gets shorter - so we need to do what makes our hearts happy and get off that darn hamster wheel before it's too late.

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  4. I had a job for 54 years. I'll be as unbusy as I want! Good advice.

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    1. I felt like I deserved the break after 40 years of working - you win hands down after 54 years! Let's enjoy every minute of our unbusyness :)

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    2. Love this sentiment! I agree

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  5. Un-busy is my favorite way to be, as long as it can include reading and needlework. I’ve always been good at it but now that I’m retired, it’s so much better. I’ve stopped stressing over how to answer the “what do you do all day” question because it doesn’t matter what others think. It’s my life!! Keep on being un-busy!!

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    1. Linda you're so right - I worried what other people would think (probably because I used to wonder what retired people did!) Now I just replace the need to tell them my schedule with the simple answer - "My days are full and I love it!"

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  6. I believe that you get to define your life and your days in whatever way you wish. I fully support and respect your desire to be unbusy. Somedays I also choose to be unbusy. Mostly though, I like to be busy and have lots of plans and goals and dreams to fulfill. Maybe my plans will change and I will decide to be unbusy. Maybe not. I am grateful to have a choice!

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    1. I think it's definitely a personal choice Michele - and some people are better at "being" while others are better at "doing". I think I'm just so relieved to be off the hamster wheel and don't want to jump onto a different merry-go-round to try to prove that I'm productive and therefore have value. I'm learning to redefine myself and it's a journey I'll probably harp on a bit more in the months to come :)

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  7. I love the whole concept of 'Becoming Unbusy'. In fact that is the name of one of my Gems of Zen as part of #ZTT in the form of a guest post by my friend Monica. She owns a yoga studio and her title is 'Chief Relaxation Officer'. I need to become more unbusy but still have this innate need to feel productive which holds me back a little. Social media in particular is very much a drain on my energy and needs addressing. I don't like to have too much on my plate. I need activities/events/appointments spaced out or I get too overwhelmed. I am fortunate that I do have a much slower paced life now than I used to but I think I could do better and still feel a bit productive. I have followed that FB page - it looks fab! Thank you! xo

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    1. I think we attach too much importance to being productive Min - and we define 'productive' in unhealthy ways at times - ie productive = constantly busy etc. Now I want to define myself differently - I don't want to be jumping from one scheduled activity to the next - I like the idea that not working allows me to spread myself out over the whole 7 days instead of having to fit it into a smaller window of free time. Some people love being frenetically busy - not me and I'm going to own that from here on out. :)

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  8. I just love this topic. Why do we glorify business? If I take an afternoon off to read or just hang out at home I feel terribly guilty. Why is this?
    I know so many people who are busier in retirement than they were when they were working!
    I love that you are taking your time and figuring out how you want to spend retirement. Sounds absolutely lovely
    Theresa @fabinyourfifties

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    1. Theresa I had that whole guilt thing happening too - especially once I stopped work (for the first time in 30 years!) and then I just took a good hard look at myself and chose to own the fact that I like this lazier and more laid back lifestyle. I think I'm going to be really good at taking my foot off the accelerator and putting my life into cruise control for the foreseeable future.

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  9. I remember one vacation that I over scheduled and didn't enjoy at all. I can't even believe that I did that to a vacation, totally ruined it for me. Now, though I still have a lot of busy time, I counter that with vacations that are "go with the flow."

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    1. I've done that to vacations too Jennifer - where I felt like I had to get "my money's worth" out of a trip. When I look back, the times when I chose not to go on a tour and just wander at leisure were the ones I remember the most fondly. So I'm off the tour bus of life for now and browsing through my days - and it's very pleasant.

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  10. Up until now, unbusy has seemed such an alien concept to me. I've always filled my days with a to-do list, just in case I'm caught metaphorically napping at any given point! But recently the concept of actually not having to do so much and just taking time to 'be' has inveigled its way into my psyche and I'm loving the feeling. Prompted by your philosophy on life after 50 I'm being inspired to take time out during my day to read, to watch the sky, walk without power walking and sip a cup of tea in the garden rather than on the move or at my computer. #MLSTL and Shared on SM

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    1. Oh Jo I'm SO glad I'm inspiring you to ease up a little. You do an amazing amount of really interesting things, and that's great. I'm less "out there" and social and driven I think, but there's something to be said for finding a balance isn't there? We can't sit reading a book all day every day, but working every day can be just as wrong - so here's to finding that perfect tipping point of tea, books, walks and work xx

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  11. It's funny Leanne as I really have a lot of time on my hands (being unemployed 'n' all). But I often feel quite overwhelmed with 'stuff'. I'm not sure if I've too much time on my hands so not very efficient in doing stuff, but it feels a bit like I have lots of things on at once (I'm doing a bit of writing work for a local company) and then babysitting for a friend and then doing stuff for my mum.

    I know if I was working it'd be far more frantic and I'm telling myself I can't complain but it's something I seem to struggle with now more than I used to - time management!

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    1. It's tricky isn't it Deb? Like I was just saying to Jo - it's about getting the balance right and once you nail that it gets easier. As much as we all think we're "doing nothing" when we're out of work, we actually still have quite a few commitments and it's making sure that they don't become our new "work" that's part of the trick. I'm trying to remind myself that nothing's compulsory any more, I can blow off a tai chi class or do the grocery shopping on a different day now that I'm not fitting it in around work. I hope you find your sweet spot soon and I'm glad you have plenty to fill your days.

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  12. I love this, Leanne! Being busy, whether retired or not, doesn't guarantee anything other than possibly exhaustion. Loving yourself and accepting yourself is key to being 'unbusy' and satisfied. I'm not at that point in my life yet, still working, but am looking forward to that day!

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    1. You're right Candi - it's about doing what's right for you and that can be different for everyone. I think it's to do with giving ourselves permission to be less "productive" and not feel like we have less value in the process. Re-defining what gives me value has been a big deal for me and probably worth a blog post down the track!

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  13. Good morning Leanne! I am definitely looking forward to a little slower pace in retirement, but there are also places I want to see and new experiences to have. I hope I can find the right balance--and that my husband and I can balance our desires for a retirement lifestyle. Thank you for hosting #MLSTL.

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    1. You hit the nail on the head with the word "balance" Christie. I think it's what makes for the perfect retirement and it will be different for each of us. For me it was learning to take some of the weight off the "be productive to be worthwhile" side and put it onto the "it's okay to enjoy extra leisure time" side. Some people will have different priorities, but I'm learning that I don't have to apologize for not wanting to live life at the same pace as when I was working - busy retirement is for other people and not for me.

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  14. I've been working towards a slower life as I go, gradually winding down so that I can accomplish a lot, while moving at the tortoise's pace, not the hare's!

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    1. Tammy I think you gave a great analogy with the hare and the tortoise, everyone gets to the same place at the end, but how we travel the path is what's important. Often we are so focused on cramming as much as possible into our days to prove we're still as productive as we were in our working days, and we miss the point that this is our time to live life on our own terms and at our own pace.

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    2. I retired even before finishing my retirement age due to my hubby's illness which made me more busier to be his caregiver. After nine years after his death, I preferred to be alone for two years without seeing anyone. My world suddenly stopped and felt so bad and helpless. I realized that I had to go out after 11 years of solitude and begun to socialized with my neighbors, my batchmates n closed friends and of course my own family. Now I am 75 years old and preferred to live
      with my daughter's family enjoying life peacefully at home with my grandchildren.

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  15. I'm so glad you are enjoying your retirement, Leanne. You are getting to a place where I have been since my early fifties, and my husband and I started this traveling lifestyle. The thing that you mentioned that really resonated with me is that you just have to stop worrying about what other people think and focus on what you really want your life to be now. Life is also so much more than what you do for a living, or what you used to do. I'm sharing to FB.

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    1. Hi Christina, when I read about your life I think you've found your perfect sweet spot and I'm hoping that I'm finding mine. Letting go of my previous "self" and finding the new me has been an interesting journey, but I'm loving the fact that I'm finally unhooking my self worth from what I did for a living and letting it stand alone.

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  16. I love this! I love the quote "Stop the glorification of Busy". That's awesome.

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    1. It's a quote I read somewhere Amy and it resonated really strongly with me - because it's exactly what our society does these days and we need to recognize that not everyone thinks 'busyness' is the scale we should use to judge others on.

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  17. Society seems to dictate we MUST be busy all the time, it doesn't matter if we are productive in a good way, just busy. I like your style much better...it suits me! #MLSTL shared on SM

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    1. Hi Donna - thank you xx And yes, it's not about what we achieve each day that we get judged on, it's how busy we are and how much running around we're doing. I find that having more free time means I do the same amount, but in a less stressful way and with chunks of down time in between - and I love that!

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  18. The flexibility in retirement can't be beat. You can choose to be un-busy or busy as much as you like, and change the pace over time. There is a big difference between being busy for busy-ness sake, and living a full life doing what brings you joy.#MLSTL

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    1. You're so right Natalie - I think some people are naturally faster paced and get bored more easily. Retirement with a list works for them, I'm finding that after 50+ years of being on someone else's schedule, I'm really enjoying stepping back and focusing on what is important to me and allowing myself some grace to just do less - it's such a wonderful reward after all those years of working so hard.

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  19. Completely agree. For several weeks now, I have had a number of appointments 3-4 days a week, plus helping with my granddaughter M-F. I feel as though I have returned to work...without the pay. I wouldn't trade my time with my grand but I do miss MY time. Quiet mornings, working on projects, getting the laundry done. There is something to be said for unbusying one's self in retirement and just being free to enjoy.

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    1. Lesley I think there are times when we have to put our needs aside to help others and you're probably in one of those atm. I'm finding that I'm in a lovely bubble of not being needed by anyone other than what I feel like contributing. I can do a little bit of everything with no expectations on me and it feels like a breath of fresh air. I'm sure there will be times when it arcs back up again, but for now I'm going to enjoy my unbusyness and stop feeling guilty for having earned it :)

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  20. Great points, Leanne! I am so happy for you, you sound centered and at peace.
    I am definitely not there yet. Then again I am not retired yet. Actually tomorrow there will be a post going live that talk about my constant struggle not to drop any balls.
    I do try, however, to find my tiny windows of fun and relaxation within the turmoil of everyday shaking and moving.

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    1. Tamara I've been you for many, many years. There are a couple of decades of our life where it's all about work and family commitments and very little "me time". A lot of us have to wait until our mid to late 60's to have some downtime, so I'm relishing the fact that mine has come earlier than I expected and I don't want to waste it by feeling guilty for having all this lovely time to myself! Your day will come xx

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  21. Loving this and watching you 'slow' to the pace of your choosing. I "dislike" the recipe for everyone to do this, this and this upon retirement. I tried one or two but neither suited me. Now I "choose" my days and they are very pleasant. I do need to connect, and I do get out every day and I do continue to stimulate my brain but it's MY way.

    Great post. Denyse #mlstl

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    1. You're so right Denyse - it's different for each of us, and I know I was feeling some sort of pressure (from myself) to try to prove that I was making "the most" of all this extra time I now have. Then I woke up to the fact that I don't have to prove anything to anybody anymore (that was a LOT of any's!) and it feels good to take that pressure off myself and stop the guilt trip and the justifications and just enjoy being unbusy (and to find there's a lot of others out there discovering it too).

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  22. I am interested in the Unbusy Movement as well, Leanne. I think we've earned this time to reassess how we want to spend our days. I like mine full, usually, with things I've planned and really want to do. (Except housework...I hate housework, but it does add to my days..., lol) The joy in retirement is that you are in control of how your day looks. If you want to read all day you can. If you want to travel, that's open to you, too. I just don't want to be tied to a routine at this point. That actually gets in my way of consistent blogging.

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    1. You summed it up beautifully - it's about being as busy as we feel like and not doing it on someone else's schedule any more. I find that each day usually has something in it that needs to be accomplished, but there's always a few hours of "my time" where I can blog, read, play computer games, do a jigsaw, or whatever and I'm just loving that so much - it's like being on holidays every day!

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  23. Leanne, I love that you don't take your phone along on your walks and don't listen to music or anything. When we've been at the seaside or other scenic areas, we've been astonished to see people walking along fiddling with their phones and completely missing out on the moment. Keep being un-busy!

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    1. Hi Jean - I see that all the time too. I don't understand how young mums can choose their screens over engaging with their child when they're walking. All that innate bonding and learning that happens in those moments is lost and that's such a shame. I think the day mobile phones connected to the internet was a sad one indeed.

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  24. I am with you, Leanne, on savouring the unbusyness of my life. The "space" is when I feel most whole. I have to be careful to not fill in every space. Here is where I have the luxury of flexibility. I added “Becoming Unbusy” and “ Simple Slow Lovely” to my reading list. I plan to savour in the new space I have created. Great post!

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    1. Hi Erica - I hope you enjoy reading more about the joys of slow living. I like the FB feed from these sites because there's so much to gain from learning to step back a little from the bustle and constantly being "on" that everyone seems immersed in these days. I don't want to fill my life with electronics - I love the internet, but don't want it to own me.

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  25. This is great to read thank you! I retired at 56 and moved to the country with my husband. This was 17 years ago and at first I got involved in everything and often found I'd be going into town 5 days a week for activities or meetings and I began to resent being so busy (mostly my own fault for not being able to say 'No'). Then along came Covid, everything stopped and we had to stay home for a few months. I found I really enjoyed this isolation and now we can start up again, I don't want to!
    I am perfectly happy only going into town for shopping once a week. I have felt a bit guilty and asked myself if I am depressed but I don't think so ... I'm just happy being "unbusy"!

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    1. Hi Terry - I completely understand what you've experienced. I felt like I needed to justify why I wasn't working too - taking on lots of "interests" and thinking I needed to look "busy". My job had burnt me out so badly that it was easier to say No to some requests, but I was still doing more than I wanted to. Covid brought everything to a complete halt and I LOVED being at home with no commitments (I even wrote a post about it: https://www.crestingthehill.com.au/2020/05/keeping-what-sparks-joy-in-retirement.html) and since things opened up again, I've thought carefully about what I want to take on - and I'm unapologetically staying home whenever I feel like it - safe, content, at peace, and really really happy :) Thanks so much for stopping by and for leaving a comment x

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  26. dol·ce far nien·te
    The sweetness of doing nothing.
    Love it! From movie "Eat Pray Love".

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    1. It's funny because I actually used that expression in another post many years ago - you reminded me and I went looking for it - you can read it here if you're interested : https://www.crestingthehill.com.au/2017/08/3-relax-proactively.html
      Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment x

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  27. Totally agree with "unbusy". It took 18 months of retirement and being "unbusy" and a boat load of medication for Crohns to go into remission . I worked as a nurse for 37 years and the last decade in severe pain . Unbusy is the way to go and I love it.

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    1. Well done on conquering your Crohns - it's a beast to live with from what I've heard. Pushing through pain, working because we have to, and putting our own needs last, were all part of life for so long. To finally reach the point where we can put our own needs towards the front and to relax and do what we enjoy - I think we've earned that don't you? :)

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  28. My husband and I have been living the unbusy retirement since we retired in 2015 and 2019 and we don't apologize for it! Some weeks it seems like we have lots to do and many weeks the calendar is pretty quiet. We are as active as we want (walks, gardening, pickleball, golf) and travel occasionally. We love having the freedom of not always having to look at the calendar and the time. To us that is retirement at it best!

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    1. We're exactly the same - my husband still does a bit of work from home - but on his own terms and because he enjoys it. I find it such a joy to live life on my own terms these days - nothing to prove to anyone and all the time in the world to pace my life exactly how it suits the day or week. I'm so glad you're enjoying this age and stage too :)

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  29. I love this! Once I started collecting Social Security, I decided that I'm officially retired, so there's no need to make big plans every day.....or any plans at all. My significant other still has a few years until he's retired, so I'm taking advantage of my alone time while I can....lol.

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    1. My husband still works part-time, so I get "home alone" time too and love it. I think it's a lovely stage of life where there's so much time to finally figure out who we are and what we want to do with the years ahead - bliss.... :)

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  30. You described me perfectly!

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    1. I think you either 'get it' or you don't.....for those of us who want to relax and enjoy this phase of life, it's an absolute blessing to be unbusy at last :)

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  31. I love this.I recently retired and when people ask me what I do all day, I say, whatever I want!!!

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    1. Me too - and it's exactly how I fill my days - every single day is about doing what I want instead of doing what I have to do, or doing stuff because others expect me to. It's such a joy.

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  32. I really enjoyed your post. I too plan to do what I want when I want when I retire soon. If I could make my husband understand he doesn’t need to give me a list to keep me “busy”!! Glad he plans to work another year!

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    1. I love the flexibility of retirement - that every day is "mine" to do what I like with. There are always different commitments and things to break up the week, but I still relish that I can slot them in where it suits me (rather than around a job!) You're going to love having time to yourself (and the house to yourself for a year!)

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  33. After being hugely busy with my corporate life, all I wanted to do is cook, make pesto and putter around in my gardens and new home (built 4 years prior). I retired at the end of January 2020 and then the pandemic hit about 6 weeks later. I felt my fairytale dream had come true. I could just stay home and relax, have fun doing all the things I had been dreaming of over the prior three years … and have date night with my husband on the patio with a glass of wine and just watch the birds fighting over the birdbath. Well, eventually we decided to sell our home and build a new home in a new state closer to our children in a 55+ neighborhood. We love it here and I have to say we have been busy pulling this home together, more visits with the kids and grands, getting to know our neighbors and traveling.
    I’m married to Mr. Antsy Pants who swims laps, plays pickle ball, bocce ball and bikes almost daily. I don’t do that, and sometimes I feel like a couch potato comparatively, but slow walks around the neighborhood, cooking fun things and puttering around the house makes me happier. I enjoy my bookclub, bocce ball learning about our new state, relaxing and social media. This summer has been filled with doctors appointments, procedures and a couple of surgeries. Keeping things low key is exactly what I want right now!

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    1. Hi Paulette - I can relate to so much of this - my husband would get on well with yours - he's always off doing something active while I'm much happier doing things on a lower key. I love my walks and puttering around the house. I left my awful job in 2019 and 6 months later covid hit. I thought it would be awful being stuck at home, but I loved it! I liked that it was slow and quiet and I could drop some of the commitments I had and then decide which ones to take up again later. I did miss seeing our kids and grandgirls when we weren't allowed to travel within our State (they live 2hrs away) but, that was lifted after a few months and then it was great again.
      I don't think we'll be moving house any time in the near future, but I'm content where I am and I won't apolgize for living a slow and content life - if people think I should be busier, well that's on them - I just sit back and smile to myself and have another coffee :)

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  34. I love this post. I worked, went to school to better myself for 45 years. Sometimes feeling guilty for not having a calendar of events, but enjoying it anyway. The main items on my daily lists are: exercise (water walk or short walk,) mentally prepare our dinner, shop for it, and do a little housework. Of course, the housework is never done, but I decided at 70 I do the best I can do. Thank you for your wisdom.

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    1. I think "deciding that you've done the best you can do" each day is a perfect way to live. If you're like me, you were always driving yourself to do more when you were younger. I felt like I needed to prove myself to me and to others - now I use the motto "nothing to prove, nothing to lose" to remind myself that it really doesn't matter - life's short and it's in our hands to live happily and contentedly - and that sums up Unbusyness to me :)

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  35. I retire towards the end of next year. When a friend asked what my plans for retirement were, I answered ‘ not go to work!’ Bring on the days of unbusy 😊

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    1. You're going to love it - there's a little bit of adjustment (and maybe even a little bit of feeling guilty for having so much "me time") but once you get the hang of it, being unbusy is the absolute gift that keeps on giving. :)

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  36. Absolutely, hands down the best article I’ve read in the 4 1/2 years since I retired. Thank you for the wonderful feeling of peace you provided. 😌

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    1. Oh Diana that was a lovely compliment - thank you. I just feel that we need more people saying it's perfectly okay to live a slower life doing the things you enjoy - we spent the first 60 years doing what everyone else wanted or needed us to do - now it's our turn to kick back and enjoy the peace. x

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  37. This was a great article for me. I don’t like it when people ask me what I’m doing over the weekend. For us, weekends are no different than M-F. When I say “ nothing special”, I feel judged. Especially by my adult children. I’m 74 and have worked since I was 16. I enjoy my quiet, unbusy time but need to stop feeling compelled to be productive. I won’t be here when my kids retire to see if they are “ busy!”

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    1. I'm getting so much better at not caring what others think of my choices. I will admit to being impacted here and there, but I'm just so grateful that "nothing special" is special to me these days. I love my at home time, my little pastimes, my freedom, not feeling the push to do something on the weekend before I'm back to the drudgery of a job. I'm happy for others to be busy, and if they don't "get" it, then maybe they will one day, and in the meantime we get to enjoy the bliss of being free of those 9-5 days. We "get" it :)

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  38. I retired July 2020 worked in health care my whole adult lift. I left work three years before retirement age thanks to hubby. I have always felt a lot of guilt about being retired early with the state of our health care system. Your post has inspired me to let it go and enjoy my unbusyness and my family. Thank you so much

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    1. Hi - I felt the same way as I worked for a surgeon and then a different specialist. There was so much responsibility in my job to make sure that patients' treatment ran smoothly and being older and more mature and caring helped too. But, after I let that go and readjusted my thinking, it's a relief to no longer have that responsibility hanging over me. I love the freedom to just look after myself and my husband, to be my own person, to worry about myself and not everyone else. It's a great time of life.

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